I need help with pleasing my husband so that he won't drink

Wilbar,

Do I understand correctly that your husband can't climax unless he has been drinking? And that you are blaming yourself for somehow being "deficient" in pleasing him?

If that is the case, STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP!!!

While I think it is unusual that he can't climax without drinking, it comes down to this--it is HIS problem, NOT yours.

I agree that sex is much more pleasant and enjoyable with a sober person as your partner.

I think you should talk with a medical professional about this. You could start with your GYN and i'm sure he/she will point you to some additional resources.

You should expect that some medical tests and therapy will be part of those recommendations. One must be properly diagnosed in order to get effective treatment.

Does your husband have a history of alcohol problems or long term use?

Bottom line here is that you can transform yourself into HIS idea of a total sex goddess and he'll probably still need alcohol in order to climax. You should BOTH get yourselves some treatment.

Just to make sure I get it across I'm going to repeat myself--This is NOT something lacking in you but it is HIS problem. (Ok, granted, it takes 2 to tango, but the primary problem is HIS)

Good luck

How long has he been sober? It doesn't sound very long. You need to accept that fact that 1.his body from quitting my need time to get back to what is normal and that's just a waiting period without drinking and 2. That he may need to see a doctor and possibly get on medication for his problem.
Trust me even though its easy to think that maybe its you a man gets a happy woody just from waking up or being relaxed and get did with you when drinking so it is not you its him .
Stop making his body your problem. Only the doctor can fix this issue.