My husband and I started having problems in the bedroom a while ago. I chalked it up to having four kids, and me having returned to work. Then over the summer things got really weird. I came home to find every stitch of carpeting torn from my house and we were going camping for the summer. We both worked so we were driving in everyday from the campground to work. Not a problem, odd but the kids had fun and they had wifi so it was good.
I got worn out from so much driving and I started spending some nights at home, closer to work. One afternoon after work, I went to a coffee shop and saw a customer from my job. He asked if he could sit with me. I didn't think anything of it. We talked and I laughed until they asked us to leave at 10pm! We left and I thought that was the end of it. But I found myself thinking of him. But why? He is 18 years older than I and I am married with four kids and a life.
We did see each other a lot the rest of the summer and my husband knew about it. Several months into this situation my husband was diagnosed with a brain tumor, he has a great prognosis, but it would explain the bedroom problems and the bizzar behaviors. I have relied on my friendship with this other guy to get through this.
I always thought people who had affairs we're just selfish and only looking out for themselves. I really truely love both of these men for completely different reasons. I have this life with my husband, but then I have these times with him that are void of stress and words like tumor, and in-laws, and mortgage. My husband has even dropped me off at his house, so we could spend time together. I really don't know what to do.
You do what any good decent wife would do who has a husband who has a medical illness. You stand by him through thick and thin. God forbid you should come down with something as devastating as what your husband has, would you want him to find solace in the arms of another woman or to find it in the woman he married, for better or worse, in sickness and health. Just because you can do something and the opportunity avail itself doesn't mean you should. Of course your husband dropped you off at the other man's house for heaven sakes he has a brain tumor, his brain is affected, what's your excuse...just rather enjoy a good roll in the hay at any cost? What will you say to your children if one of them should come to you and mirrior your behavior if one of their spouse should have a major medical problem? We do reap what we so in this life...sooner or later, the rooster returns to the nest. Think about that!