i just want him to be the kind person he can be

I got with my partner 3 years ago he is 15 years older than me i was working when i met him at the age of 25 always worked and lived in my flat had my own car he is fairly wealthy and insisted i stopped working for my employer cause i was on a rubbish wage they were using me , so he insisted i was very tired having previously been in a difficult relationship where i was the only one working and there was a lot of violence toward me , it all seemed a relief, he wanted me to move in fairly soon havin not moved any previous girlfriends in with him before i feltspecial and was excited someone wanted to look after me for once so i left my job and settled in to my new home after a few months he started to get angry quickly over silly things like if he couldnt fi8nd something he wanted like keys or paperwork and started blaming me and shouting aggresivly i often went and started to pack my stuff to leave as i didnt want that again in my life and he would apologise and say how he loves me this went on every so often over a few months and i started to react and shout back or even tell him what he made me feel like and he would start getting right in my face and squeezing my cheeks with his hands when i started pushing him away more he got more violent pulling my head to the groung by my hair or covering my mouth if i screemed when it hurt and has strangled me and other violent acts , im not perfect and i can tolerate so much before i react thats when it normally happens i love him as he can be charming and loving i am also running a business he set up for me which i couldnt of done on my own so i feel i owe him to stay and make it work but i am feeling lonley and find he dosent listen to my feeling just says its my fault i dont go out with friend i stay in and do everything i can for him he doesnt like me going out or seeing friends he will argue with me when i get back so i just dont bother ive tried leaving and he has got upset and makes out im a bad person hes accused me of having met someone else and he will find out and hurt them but there is no one i just want him to be the kind person he can be and let me live a bit more i feel isolated and alone