Medical Questions > Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum

i just need to talk i guess....

Hello people, Im 32 years old and unfortuntely someone who i truly loved and cared for has ended our relationship. We've been in a relationship for 10 years and with all my heart i can say that i loved her. She called it off because mainly she stopped loving me. Is that really possible? can you stop loving someone after 10years? She swears blind that no-one else was involved and i believe her 100% but why do i get this stupid feeling that she has been seing someone else, even though there was no signs? To make matters worse we even bought a house together, and i planned on a surprise proposal to her some time in the near future. but i guess thats never going to happen.

I've been through break-ups before and once i really contemplated taking my own life, but then reality kicked in on the last second and i'm grateful it did, because i met her and fell in love again (10 year relationship one). I know most of you people feel anger and bitter, and dont know which way to turn to, it feels like your world has turned upside down. But what i have learnt is NOT to feel these.

Now i cant say that im not heart-broken and im not in pieces because i am, i still think about her every minute for the past 2 days. I've even cried and lost my appetite, and skipped work. I even cried 10 minutes before writing this post. In a matter fact tears are still rolling down as i am writing this.

What i am trying to get at is this:-
If you ever have felt true love for someone and they end it, why remember all the bad things. I tend to think about the good times we had, and forget about the bad times. If one relationship does end no matter how serious they are, they happen for a reason, and that reason is that its not meant to be, or maybe sometime in the distant future things might go your way.
True love will always find its way back to you whether it be the same person or a different person, no matter what age you are.

Now i can kick myself all day hoping that she would regret her decision, and feel all the pain i feel (which she probably does anyway), but why would anyone even want to wish someone possibly the worst pain your ever going to feel if you loved them. imo thats not true love.

I wished her all the best when we separated, and sincerely hoped that she would be happy again, but unlike most post here, even though we are not together, the thought of her in pain to me is most unbearable, and i think thats what hurts me the most. I know that there is a very very high chance of us not being together again, and i accepted it. I think thats the very first step you must take, is to accept its over, instead of looking back and thinking what if i've done this, or done that differently.

I think everyone wants a quick remedy for these bad feelings to just go away (i know i do), but they simply just dont. I know because i have been there twice now. You just have to learn how to live with these feelings and try your uppermost best to not let it get in the way of thinking that you are never going to find love again. I say this because true love never goes away. You might not find the same girl / guy as before, but you will always love the same person no matter what. Its a thing that lives inside you (a memory, a life time experience that you may or may not find again with another person.

I am happy that i have experienced love, but at the same time sad because i lost the person who meant the most to me. I am sure most of you probably feel this too. I rely on the thought of my family and freinds caring about me to give me the strength from day to day.

I hope that anyone here that reads this post, will learn how to forgive thier ex partners for whatever they have done because believe me it really does help with the healing. I know this is my way of dealing with things, and people deal with problems thier own way, but at lease i have found some form of inner peace.

Im sorry im blabbering on to most people, and my sentences are all over the place, I guess its just natural emotions. I am just writing what i am feeling. I sincerely hope that all you of people who have got thier hearts broken to get better, and find someone who will love you and continue to love you until death do you part.

jenfen
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