I have suffered from depression from my teens and alot of it stemmed from low self esteem. I just never seemed to meet anyone who was prepared to give me a chance. I could never approach anyone I really liked and if I did I usually made a hash of it. later on in life being unemployed made it hard to get on and get confident. I always felt out of it socially and really uneasy in groups of people. Along time ago I met a girl that I really liked but she wouldn't have anything to do with me and so I just got so fed up and gave up. I just didn't know what to do nor did I have anyone to confide in. Life has always been really hard and now I feel that life is really passing me by, especially knowing that she is happy. It is difficult to know what to do for the best.
Go to a dance club like j2n said go with some mates you dont have to (:and you shoudl build up some confidense (: be sensitiv ubut determind be a ladies friend [= dont smother them or if you see a girl you rely like and she seems nice not dancing with any1 go up to her and say(say how you like her hair) or if shes dancing say(nice dance moves) and just walk away slowly but make sure she see's you
As a teen I went thru the same problems. Low self esteem. I still struggle with depression. To my amazment, I have actually had one of my biggest crushes ask me out...but I turned him down because of my insecurities. I know...i really do know that its not easy. Im 21...and I just now had a real relationship...only for it to end in disaster. Now Im back in the same boat as you...hello friend-ill row with you.
You have to remember one thing tho. I get sick of hearing it but the more you hear it the better understood. You have to learn to love yourself before you let someone else love you. Once you have achieved that...you will see your confidence rise and you will be able to have fun with life...and meet someone special. As hard as it seems to keep your head above water, just dont give up no matter how rough life can be...I havent
First get your life on track, find something that interests you, get educated if need be, get a nice job. Doesn't have to be something impressive, but something you'll grow comfortable with.
Self confidence is not achieved by success, but by positive expectations. People with confidence think: "I'm going to do this." while people without have failure in their heads. It's OK to make mistakes, so don't be afraid of it should not cloud your mind.
A girlfriend can't help you with this, first figure things out for yourself, make some friends if you can, find people with similar interests (the internet is abundant with groups to share hobbies and what not).
Well, I can tell you for starters that I'm not depressed or anything like that. I don't have social anxiety and I'm extremely outgoing. I feel that when I talk to people that I get along rather well, but the wiered thing is that after awhile people just start to write me off. I have no friends in college, the only friends I have are back in high school. Also I hate to seem cliche for these forms but i've never had a girl friend, although I have many acquaintances of whom are girls, I'm 18 so its not like I feel like a total loser. Anyways the way I feel is that everyone else are just as nutty and human as I am so it makes no sense to me why others have friends over me. It's like there's some weired census that everyone agrees to avoid me. I know I can read people so i'm not autistic or anything. Such an example of my people reading abilities is that before anyone knew my mom was cheating, my mother gave me an airplane magazine and said it was from some guy at work; she wouldn't give me the guys name so I new instinctively that my mom was cheating with whom ever gave me the airplane magazine. I'm pretty good at mind reading which obviously doesn't for a good social disorder. Also I'm not a stupid person, I'm doing quantum mechanics and such for freshman undergraduate college. Its that I don't know why people wont to hang out with me, I'm just wondering if there's a disorder besides aspbergs out there that can explain it. I've already gone to my school councilor and she said that I didn't have asbergs or autism.
It's like there's some weird census that everyone agrees to avo
I've been there...a lot of people just seem to have more than enough friends and they don't seem to be interested in having more. Those are mostly random, replacable friends while it's the special friends you should cherish. If you have a click with someone, stay in touch with that person or (s)he'll be gone. Try to give it some structure, meet up regularly, everytime you depart make a decision where and when to meet next. It's good to change your environment and not get stuck with the same people and places over and over. At work I have found this extremely rewarding, I work for a large company and traveled around a bit within the building, it takes time before you find the really cool guys that you can get along with.
Working in a place with people of all different ages is a real confidence booster i work in a shop (not fancy at all) but ive met lots of friends through there and wheni go out with them i meet more people. a year ago i was lonley and depressed a lot can change in a short space of time u just have to make the effort to change it its not easy but it will pay off in the end
I'm 19 and i feel a lot like sol66 up there feels. I know it's probably hard for you and i know how you're feeling. I have a facebook and periodically on my news feed i'll see pictures of all my friends on trips or with their girlfriends having a grand ole time and i feel that i deserve that too. I've always been great in social situations and am not nervous or awkward at all. I sometimes even get compliments on being funny or smart, but it feels like it doesn't matter because the memo went out to all 6.5 billion people that i am socially "inadequate" for them. So i just wanna let you know that you are not alone. And i think you can confide in this forum and open up if you need to. We're all in the same situation and i think it feels good, for me anyway, to open up without the fear of ridicule or embarrassment.