I'm so sorry that your mother is so controlling and I'd feel exactly the same way in your situation.
It goes without saying but just in case, I'll be direct--it's okay to be sad and upset. Just know that emotions like these are REACTIVE/PASSIVE, not active. Be sad and angry about their actions and the consequences of those actions, but not AT them. Be sad and angry that your life isn't where it needs to be right now, but don't just be sad and angry at yourself.
Death is never the answer--the death of you or killing your parents, although I'm sure most of us want to at least once in our lives
Give yourself some time to let it all out and feel sad/upset, but then pick yourself and try to keep going! Eventually you won't live with them and you can live the life you want, but in the meantime you're doing your best with the cards you were dealt, and that's the most anyone can ever ask of you.
Good luck, and feel free to message me/reply for support, advice, or just someone to rant to, any time at all!