I know I am depressed, I was on medication for a while, it only helped for a short time.
I feel like I need to get away from this life.
I have a boyfriend, but right now he is just annoying me, he doesn't understand how I feel at all. And when I try to tell him he doesn't really listen and if its something to do with him he gets all defensive and upset.
We rarely have sex anymore, I can't be bothered and its not as good as it was anyway (which makes me even less bothered about sex). He seems to moan all the time which just makes me snap at him.
I have a dog, he is driving me up the wall, he is out of control, and I keep telling my boyfriend this and that he needs to be trained, but he doesn't think the dog is that bad. He is you can't take him anywhere he has no behaviour and snaps at us. He tries to bite us when we put him in his cage.
My son got placed with his father by the courts about 6 years ago, we had regular contact but now his father is saying he doesn't want to see me, and I haven't seen him in just over a year now. I have instructed a solicitor on this matter from back in June last year, and we have tried everything outside of the court and they still maintain my 7 year old son does not want to see me, so now we have submitted an application to the court and are waiting for a date so I can get contact again. I still have parental rights, but my son's father and his family act like I don't exist, they take him out of the country and all sorts and do not think it is courtious to even let me know.
I am at university but I am finding it impossible to do my work now. I can't concentrate for long enough. I often find myself either in tears or on the brink of tears and then my bf just keeps harrassing me to do my work as if I don't know it is important.
I am addicted to the internet, it seems like the only consistent place I can go, and I can chat to people on here and pretend I feel okay, but I don't.
I was managing to go out with friends, but I haven't for ages.
I am in the Territorial Army and stopped attending for a long time because I can't concentrate and I don't want to do stupid things and get this piss taken out of me. But obviously I don't want to tell them I am depressed incase they tell me to leave. I am going on a course soon and I am trying to look forward to it as it will be a break from all of the above with new people that do not know me.
I don't know what kind of replies to expect I just needed to tell someone.