Just remember it's not your fault and that NO you don't deserve to be treated that way.

Get yourself a loan for school and live on campus. You need to look after yourself too!!

I am in a similar situation. My mother is very emotionally abusive and always tells me how much of a problem I am to her. I am 21 and she wants me to move out and get married so that she doesn't have to see me anymore. I know I don't deserve it because I am a good person, with good grades in university.

Remember that it was their decision to come to a different country. They knew it would be difficult. You are worth more, and your mental sanity is worth WAY MORE!!

Hope you will find a way!

I am in the same situation like you too. My dad is very bad temper. He yells at anything n anyone that doesn't come along his way. He blames on everyone all the time. But the real mistake is coming from himself. He thought he is always rite. Maybe that is why he fall till the step he is now. I believe in how you treat ppl, you will get it back.

You're not alone.
My father was a drug addict (he still could be for all I know), he was also a drug dealer of Cocaine and Marijuana. When I was about 4, he was arrested for drug use and drug promoter. My mother, my two brothers, and I moved in with my mom's parents. That was the happiest years of my life; being cared for by my grandparents, having not a care in the world.

By the time I turned 11, he came back. We moved out of my grandparents house, and moved into a new house, with my father. The first year and a half, he was fine. He had a job like everyone else, paid the bills. But then after that, he started to act funny. He would make me bring him food, he would be gone with his nephew all the time (who was also a drug user/dealer, and had a problem with gambling), and I remember this one time when he came home drunk; thowing up everywhere (my mom works at night, so she wasn't there), so I had to take care of him. I stayed up all night, wiping up his puke. I was 12 then.

And then things got even worse, he stopped working, he became very controlling over my mom, making her serve food for him (he stopped asking me, because once I rolled my eyes when he asked me to make him a cup of juice. Which incidentally, made him upset and told my mom that I deserved to be thrown out for that small act.), clean up his mess, get him his ciggarettes, etc... He accused my mom of having an affair with a co-worker of hers numerous times. And calls her deragitory names.

But he was not like this all the time, just most times. Due to his excessive drug use, he formed a bi-polar disorder. Which explains why sometimes one day he's nice, and the next day he's a complete a**. But I can be safe to say that he hardly ever hit my mom. He just throws things, and break things and yells profanity all the time.

When I was 13, my parents had a huge fight, in front of my brothers and I. They were fighting in my room. And all that came out of it was a hole in my door. They were going to file a divorce, but it never went through. Which, to this day, I have no idea why it never happened.

I am now 16, and my parents fight almost every month, once a month. My father still doesn't work. My mom's struggling to pay the bills. But he doesn't care. All he does is sit around on the couch, watch tv and eat all of the food. As I'm typing right now, he's in his "bad days", and eating every 10 minutes. He broke my mom's car (which she's had since we were living in my granparents house), so she depends on my brother to get to work and back home everyday. She can hardly ever go to the market, because my brothers always working and since HE broke her car. He always complains that he doesn't have anything; no clothes; no shoes; no food. But HE DOES. He EATS ALL OF THE FOOD. And his clothes lie everywhere, I feel and almost twisted my ankle once because his shoes are in the walkway.

He blames my mom for him not having a job. I remember this one time recently, but not so recently (maybe like a the beginning of this year) he had an application for a job, the next day, he starts yelling at her because SHE did not fill it out. I mean what the heck?
And he can't get a good job, because he barely even finished high school.

I just don't get it. My mom says she's tired of it. Tired of it all. But she doesn't do anything to stop it. She takes the abuse. And worse yet, after they fight, they act as if nothing wrong ever happened at all. I don't know if she's scared of being alone, or if she's scared of him. She doesn't confide in her kids. We are all old enough to umderstand everything. I'm 16, my brother is 18 and my older older brother is 21.

I don't know what to do anymore. I've thought of killing him. Hell, all 3 of us have thought about killing him. Because I KNOW our lives would be so much easier if he wasn't alive anymore. He's like Satan put on earth to make our lives living hell. I'm embarrassd of him. I carry his name, and every time someone asks me what my last name is I can't help but fell ashamed. But I'm glad that I'm a girl and I won't have to keep it.

Just know that you are not alone.

My father behaves like a kid. He only wants to be with the family when everything is ok. when we were going through difficult times he simply left. My mom pays all the house bills. He buys food and hides it from us, and then he accuses my mom of hiding food from him. I wish my mom and dad were divorced so that my mom could be happy. He's not a resposible adult, he's just another kid in the house.

Same HeRE..i feel your pain..my dad is also very dependent when it comes to physical work because he had a stroke last last year... i know he is trying his best in his work and stuff but he thinks he's all that and that he knows everything just because he finished college and my mum didn't...he's never been close to me ever since i was small but because i had to go back with my mum and him in london just last year, i had to put up with his unnecessary tantrums...when we're alone, he just sticks with the computer like his life is in there...i never talk to him..cuz i dunno what to say and i dont want to have a conversation with him anyway..he lacks understanding that's why...when he talks to me it's always about computer..it's pissing me off..since we live in the same house now, i can clearly see how he treats my mum and i dont like it...now i'm purposely acting cold towards him because i found out about his big secret.. he's gay...and he actually betrayed my mum before she moved in london..the fact that it's my dad that did it disgusts me...now everytime i see him, i cant help but feel annoyed...so i dont look at him even if he's there..even now he continues chatting with different guys and even had a facebook account and what's frustrating is he added me..and i can clearly see that he's flirting with different men... i hate him..now i can't help but just hate him...i don't feel any love from him so he wont get any from me either...he's unreasonable and he's never satisfied with my accomplishments..thank god my mum loves me for who i am..truthfully, i dont need him...my mum also brought up the idea of separating with him if worse comes to worst..and you know, i dont mind it..i'll live with my mum only and i'll be happier..we're better off without him..:'C