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I feel like I'm a loser and worthless

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Well basically let me just say I can't believe I've gotten to the point where I'm posting my story on the internet. I don't know what I hope to get out of it, maybe just to get it off my chest. So anyway, I'm 27 years old and recently graduated college with a BS in Criminal Justice. The thing is near the end of my college career, I began to lose interest in the Criminal Justice field. However, since by that time I was approaching graduation, I just felt like it was too late to turn back. Plus I am now 27, and I'm not getting any younger. I just didn't want to do anything related to dealing with criminals and people of that sort. I am a very stressful person, and I just know working in a career such as that would eventually get to me. If I going to get that main career that's gonna support me for years to come, it sure as hell can't be something I am gonna be miserable doing. The thing is, it just seems like with a degree in criminal justice, your basically confined to jobs within that field. They really don't carry over into other types of careers. I mean how many fortune 500 companies are in dire need of criminal justice majors? All my life I have worked at low rate jobs such as grocery stores and the like, so I really don't have any desirable experience that would make a company want to hire me, just a measly 4 year degree in what seems like a limited field. Right now I push in shopping carts and help people load their merchandise into there cars at the Home Depot for $8.55/hr,. I'm married and my wife and I just barely scrape by. I feel pathetic, I mean com'on, 27 years old and pushing in carts for a living while most everyone of my peers who are of the same age have gotten their lives going and are at decent jobs and supporting themselves. I still have to ask my dad for help financially. Every time I talk to an old friend I just happen to run into from high school or so, and we're doing the whole "so what have you been up to?" bit, I feel so embarrassed admitting that I push in carts for a living. I have been applying at certain jobs which I feel I might have a chance at getting, but the rejection letters are stacking up. "We decided to go with someone more qualified" is a statement I now hear in my sleep. Its just so hard to keep my head up sometimes. Being 27 and not having my life together yet just makes me feel like the walls are closing in. I try to keep positive, but I go through certain episodes where I start too feel extremely low and hate myself feeling like I'm a loser (like right now). Sometimes I find myself just crying when alone. My parents suggests different things to me and are supportive, but mostly what they suggest is in the criminal justice field and I hate telling them I don't want anything in that, I feel like I disappoint them and are letting them down. Perhaps one of the most stressful thoughts I have is that I just spent all that time and money on school to graduate with a degree I feel is worthless, now it was all wasted and I'll never get that time back, never be able to go back and change things. I screwed up my life and now I don't know what I'm gonna do. I don't know if I am depressed. I've seen a doctor in the passed about my stress and was prescribed Prozac, but my I can no longer afford insurance so I haven't seen anyone in a few years. I feel depressed but I cant be sure if I am in fact suffering from depression, I hope not. So anyway, sorry for the long story. If you took the time to read this whole thing, thank you.
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First Helper Bonz4i
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replied November 21st, 2011
You're ONLY 27. Believe me, in the not too distant future you'll realize just how young that is. And getting any kind of degree is nothing to be ashamed of, even if you've decided the field is not for you - how were you to know until you tried? Please don't feel embarrassed about your job, either. This story is an all-too-familiar one these days. It's not your fault, just the state of the world. Keep your head up, things will get better for you. You are clearly intelligent and, from the sounds of it, loved. You'll be just fine.
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replied November 30th, 2011
Thank you for your kind words. Keeping my head up is always the hard part but I'll try. Thank you.
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replied December 1st, 2011
I googled "I'm 27 and a loser" and came across your post on whatever website this is. If nothing else, it was at least comforting to know that I'm not the only guy in this sort of situation. I have a marketing degree. I was passionate about art, but my parents were never supportive and since they were footing the bill for school I had to do something with business. My relationship with them is complicated at best. They've completely glazed over the fact that they were borderline abusive when we were younger, which makes accepting their charity impossible for me. I make $11 an hour making sandwiches for customers that talk down to me, and I can't say anything back because I'm at work and I kind of can't afford to lose my job. I have a gf of almost 9 years, but things aren't working out. All we do is fight, and it has been that way for over a year now. I had health insurance briefly last year and saw a doctor about my anxiety, at least I thought my problem was anxiety before he told me I may have depression. He gave me some "happy pills" that actually did change my mood after about a month, but the prescription ran out and so did my insurance. I also found out I have diabetes which hasn't been a picnic. Sigh...it doesn't matter, I know nothing is going to really change or make me feel better until the root issues are addressed. I need a decent job so that I can support myself without relying on anyone else. I need to be independent. I need to not be one step away from having nothing. If my car broke down tomorrow I don't know what I'd do. If I got sick tomorrow I don't know what I'd do. The economy isn't getting better, there aren't any jobs for people like me with no experience, which makes it impossible to get any experience. How sad it is that we're crying to the Internet. At least it's anonymous. You posted this a couple of weeks ago. I hope you're doing better, I hope I will be too.
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replied May 18th, 2012
Possible solution?
Criminal justice degree? Hey man that actually sounds pretty cool to me. I know from what you wrote that you are not feeling it, but think about this on an international scale. If I were you, I would take the GRE and do graduate's work for something like international law, and work to stop global problems like human trafficking and modern day slavery. If you study and are accepted under such an endeavor, you would be sure to get all kinds of aid, loans, waivers, funds for living expenses, student insurance, all kinds of help. Then maybe you could preoccupy your time studying for something more for the "big picture", rather than find opportunities to sink into depression. Just a kind suggestion, mate. I hope it all works out whichever path you take. If you do decide to do more graduate work, just know that there are a few hoops to jump through to get the gig, but knowing this beforehand can help to mentally prepare yourself for the next step in academics. Good luck!
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replied May 23rd, 2012
Firstly, thank you for posting. I am 27 as well. Unlike you I didn't go any university or college. Infact I left school at 15. In retrospect I gained a ton of street smarts. As you know though being 27 and not knowing what the heck to do is rather unbearable. Think of the facts, you have a wife, yes you have a degree that you don't wish to pursue, However if you do wade in the legal waters a bit it has to pay more than what your currently making. Try it Smile PLEASE do NOT be embarrassed about your situation! Atleast you care enough to worry about your future. If you will for something better and work towards that than it is sure to come. Even if it takes fighting tooth and nail. Give'em Hell!
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replied May 27th, 2012
Hang in there...
Hey, I know this is an old posting and I doubt anybody will read this. However, I have an AA in liberal arts, an AS in administration of justice, and a BA in criminal justice. I obtained these through a California junior college and a state university. I'm also a military veteran that served in Iraq and I was active duty. Dude, I graduated from college in December 2010 and it is now 05/27/2012. I had to move into my mother's home after I graduated because I could not land a job. I'm still living here. Please, keep your head up man. THINGS WILL WORK OUT EVENTUALLY. I do not know when or how, but your going to be alright. It is just not going to be on your schedule. By the way, I'm 30 years old.
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replied May 29th, 2012
Hey, I just found your post by searching Google for "I am a 27 year old loser". No idea what site this is but
I guess it's comforting to know that I not the only one.
Honestly don't know why I'm typing this as I doubt anyone will even read it, and I can't see how it could possibly help me or anyone else.

I've always been a failure at life. Quit school when I was 16 because I simply could not handle the social anxiety any longer. Worked heaps of sh*t jobs on and off. I'm a good worker and everybody appears to like me, but I have zero self confidence and all of my unfounded fear and anxiety is unbearable. If I have 2 weeks off from work, it's guaranteed that I will be stressing about work 13 days before I have to go back. I usually quit by just not showing up, or texting the boss saying that I've had a bit of a "freak out" and that I am very sorry and that they wouldn't see me again. I would then go and buy another phone with a new number. I'm fearful of going anywhere now because of the thought of running into any ex employers. I don't even like going to the supermarket in case I bump into someone.

I also have no friends any more because I never call anyone or answer my phone. I'm so afraid of them finding out how much I suck, that I have completely abandoned them. The only person I have in my life is my girlfriend of 6 years (we live together). She is the most caring and understanding person, but I'm afraid I'm just dragging her into my pathetic black hole.

I have a half finished Certificate IV Info Tech, half finished chef's apprenticeship, half finished Avionics apprenticeship, and I've just recently quit my Bachelor of Tech degree after 2 years. I'm a quitter. I even managed to quit smoking.
Stupid thing is I did really well in all of these things, but for some reason my mind eventually wavers, my energy vanishes, and I see no reason to continue (obviously f#*king stupid).

I'm now jobless, turning 28 in less than a month and feeling as though I am done with this life. I'm over it. I have absolutely no idea how I can sustain myself.
I don't even have the balls to kill myself. Voluntary admission into a mental hospital sounds mind numbingly possible, but then again my fickle nature wouldn't allow me to fully accept it and before I know it I would be back on the internet typing in "I am a 29 year old loser".

Sometimes I just wish I was a cloud. Floating without a
care in the world and pissing when I felt the need.
Either that or some guy on a beach in Thailand that sends his monkey up a palm tree to get coconuts, machete the top of, pour in some rum, pop in a straw, and sell to the tourists. Or become a wandering botanist (totally unrealistic).
But then the other side of me wants to go completely f#*king nuts.
Fill myself up to the eyeballs with drugs, buy some prostitutes and get into a high speed car chase just for the f#*k of it.

What am I even talking about? Ugh. I'll stop now.

Well, sorry that I don't have any advice for anyone.
I really hope you all eventually manage to find your way. This world mightn't be meant for us, but what other choice do we have? Sometimes it's the little things that help to make it better. Like a ray of warm sunlight on your skin. Or the sound of a gently trickling stream. Or the punk-like way that pigeons nod their heads when they walk. Or seeing annoying kids hurt themselves. Or the time I half finished shaving my face, got distracted for about an hour, fell into a pit of sadness and despair, walked passed the mirror with tears in my eyes, looked up and burst out laughing.

There must be a way. I will keep on trying. Good luck to everybody and I love you all.
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replied June 30th, 2013
I read your post and it mirrors my life especially the loss of friends and dragging my significant other into a black hole with me. I hate feeling sorry for myself. I think about ending my life at least once a day but somehow I still manage to keep going too. This is my first post on a board like this so thanks for sharing and helping me share. It helps to know I'm not the only one as well.
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replied October 10th, 2012
i am typing the same thing into google that the rest of you did....funny thing is ive done it before and gotten past it then revisited on many occasions....I dont really know why I feel like such a loser actually, I have a good job, im good looking, i have my own house, but then again im not in charge at work, many women arent attracted to me and I dont live in the best neighborhood and I have a lot of updating work to do on it.....two sides of the same coin really it all depends on your point of view. Ive seen a psychiatrist before to try and counter my affinity to embracing a negative outlook on myself, but it helps as much as anything else has.....meaning that as soon as the cinder block shoes find their way onto my feet again the benefits of medication and therapy and meditation and happy thoughts...etc. become lost in the overwhelming foggy mess that becomes my life, I used to think that a wonderful woman would someday somehow have the ability fix my mind and prevent my downfalls, but that is wishful thinking of an easy external fix for something that lies inside, proof of which lies in my past relationships....im not writing this seeking to provide advice to any of you, but perhaps studying the troubles of others can provide some insight into yourself and give you something in the fog to grasp onto. It has worked for me in the past....however not yet in the present, apparently these trials are meant to be relived in some lives cyclically, maybe its to prove that i can find a way through to force me to realize that my life really does have a meaning with value....maybe its not....I clearly dont know, what i do know is that while i havent felt like this for %100 percent of my life i do feel this way %100 percent of the time sometimes....makes it hard to remember when i didnt.....but im currently making another appointment with my psychiatrist....what else can i do? doing nothing is something.....and its something that only makes things worse, ive proved this myself multiple times....however doing something about my situation instead of nothing is often times not much better and sometimes worse, but if i was sinking in a pit of quicksand i like to think i would rather die trying to get out then just sit and sink no matter what my state of mind was at the time....and that is all that depression is....its a state of mind and it affects what is real in your life by coloring things in ways that make you see them in false tones and not how they truly are.....makes you see the other side of the coin that things could be better......but they are not better because you are not.....and the blame lies with you.....but why does it have to be your fault? there are other people in this world, things you cant control, why does the blame lie on you?.....because of things that could be or would be if you weren't like this all the time? what a vicious cycle. It reminds me of trying to swim your way out of a whirlpool....I wouldn't know the best way to do that and would likely fail to get away with my life....but once again i would be swimming in the direction that i thought best and not giving up, instead of being dragged willingly to my early death....i likely wouldnt be worried about my position as compared to other people in that situation....something else to think about, an idle body seems to be the most fertile ground for depression however i must agree that it grows anywhere it can, like mold on my soul, maybe i am destined to keep doing my best to clear it and keep it away....it follows along with most other things in this world.....if you dont properly maintain any machine or working system it will fall into disrepair or cease to function at all, and that is what we are....organic machines that must be maintained in certain ways to keep us together with the goal of living in a way that is good and satisfying, and sometimes the path to that place is the good and satisfying part
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replied October 11th, 2012
30 years old, no career path, married and hate my sex life. Maybe have sex every quarterly or half yearly. Don't know what to do with my career goals. Can't imagine life without the mrs. I am now becoming bitter, angry, envious and just downright miserable. What the hell do I do??! My past jobs have been 3 years recruitment - hated it! I am cemap qualified -1 and half mortgage advisor - compliance pissed me off. Part time car trader which is where I am at now. Haven't got a clue what to do!!' I feel ashamed when I speak to people about work or sex. It's getting to a point now where I am just fed up of life and come to the end of the road or the edge of a cliff. I really hate it.
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replied October 11th, 2012
I feel like a complete laughing stock and try to stay away from people I know as much as I can. The only time I can have a laugh is when I get hammered with the booze. I'm becoming depressed I think and it's worrying times. My mrs thinks I'm being silly and everyone thinks I'm strong but deep down I feel alone and angry and just don't know how I can ever change or claw my life back?!
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replied December 23rd, 2012
never give up!
I am a 30 year old man, single just broke up with my partner after 4 years. I've been working 4 years as a tech support and before that I worked as abroad for 2 years. Nothing happens. All of my colleagues are all successful having their own car and business. Me, I lost my Job 5 months ago and I don't want to go do the same damn work because I am not happy for it. Now, still no clear career path..I am deciding to go back and work abroad but I don't know what career. I felt that my family was disappointed because I am the only child who have a degree in Computer Science but I was not able to used it as a career. I'm still trying to think never to give up.. I tried to make sure I look young and professional. My friends told me "Time will come" but when is that time? I am not getting any younger anymore. Posting positive quotes in Facebook about reaching your dreams to lessen my loneliness. Yeah! I felt I am a loser but I am trying not to give up. what will happen next?
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replied April 22nd, 2013
sure-shot solution
join yoga classes. i am sure as hell that your gloomy mood and the disappointed attitude SHALL change. once you start feeling perfectly healthy and fresh, you would gain courage to face anything with smile. and the effects would start to unveil within two to three days. within one week you would find yourself swimming in confidence to do something great. one more thing, the breathing excercises or pranayams are more better for you than the physical postures(asanas).
it has done miracles for e. i was in a similar situation for four years and then it revived me. i found my new hidden qualities or talents which had been suppressed due to ignorance. while i had done engineering graduation, i now write for magazines and sometimes for newspapers.
if you want to know how yoga would make you feel, then do watch the movie LIMITLESS (the yoga acts as the nzt in the movie).
best of luck for your life ahead.
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replied May 8th, 2013
Please keep your head up high my friend , Do not loose hope , My friend who failed in his final year in school is now a running a very successful construction company which is now one of the biggest in the city . Do not give up , I am sure there are many jobs available for your degree , if you find it tough getting a job , no problem you can always do a post grad degree and start working after that , nothing is impossible my friend , If you are looking for a good self help good I suggest the secret , You are young and have many years ahead of you, I am sure you have a hidden potential and talent that is waiting to be unlocked , It's never too late to become what you might have been . If you need inspiration look up to people like Chris gardener A great man who become a millionaire after being homeless ,At least you have shelter or a comfortable living space Remember Do the little things well , then the big things will automatically flow
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replied May 20th, 2013
stuff
My brain physically hurts from all the thinking I do. I analyse endlessly weather or not I want to. I hate where I am in life. No degree, no respectable job. I live with my parents. The only good thing in my life is my fiance and she has been complaining that I'm not working towards a career to support us. That I'm "doing nothing with my life." What sucks is that she's right, but there is no career that actually sounds enjoyable, possible, or even likely. Everything I've tried has failed. I worked security for a while and I have never been so depressed in my life, even though it was the highest paid job I've ever had it still wasn't enough to move out of my parents. I have student loans and car payments, car insurence, phone bills, hospital bills...it just never ends. I don't want to do it anymore. I don't think I could ever bring myself to commit suicide but I feel like I can't go on living either. I want to be murdered or die accidentaly so that no one will be mad at me and I won't feel guilty right before. I hate all the negitive emotions I feel all the time and I don't feel enough positive one's to make up for it. I feel like I have no useful tallents. The only thing I'm good at is putting others before myself, which is great for them but not a nice life for me. I'm too nice too often. I like to act because I can pretend I'm someone else, and even if that character I'm playing is just as depressed as I am, at least it's a new and different experience. I just hate feeling the same things over and over. I feel like it will never end and I'm tired of hearing bull. People say "it will get better" but they're lying. they don't know because they can't know. there guessing and at that they are being unrealisticly optomistic. I used to be optomistic, but I think I'm too intelligent for that now. I see the world for what it is. nothing. a random waste of space. I need help. I need a savior. I used to believe in a god but there's just nothing now. it's all stories and they can't help me if I know they aren't true. I need a real savior. someone to do something, anything to make life fun again. to fix my problems or at least show me how I can fix them for myself, because as of right now I don't see any way.
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replied June 7th, 2013
are u Muslim or Christin? look it is in your on hand to b happy or not because you can see that a rich is also depressed or a poor one is also.... happiness not come to money its comes to love and care for each other. it you think about sucide and even you don't like it to be think about it ...... you should think about your parents your fiance what will they do with out you ...
you are a talented person just you have lack of motivation many people in this world do work hard and gain a highest status only because they are motivated and work hard and never lose hope. you talent is hide in you and need to be polish it need to be continuous motivation... trust yourself....be positive... say to your self you are not less then other
when ever you think about negative thoughts say to your self stop it and try to think about that thing which make you happy and think about the people who are lower then you and help others and exactly you will feel happiness in depth
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replied August 12th, 2013
we have to learn something new...
I think that the solution is kick your reality 4SS! you have the right to quit so just do it, live the life and his nihilism...there are plenty other place in the world when you can live better and happier, all you have to do is move there, wherever you want, because your problem is not you are not good, you are a human being and that mean you are full of potential, the real problem is the culture you were born doesn't worth because all those things like tradition, values and status quo, useless sh#ts that keep your potential low as posible...so reject all that cr4p and start over, revitalize yourself, find something new and exciting that rebirth your pasion and your love for life, and if that doesn't fit with the the image of winner that other people are expecting for you, who f***ing care!
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replied September 11th, 2013
loser
im 29 and i cant find any job i really want to start my education dont n how to start Sad
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replied December 17th, 2014
Find your Bliss.
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