When im really angry or sad or frusterated, i cut. It makes me feel so much better afterwards, like, if im having a really hard time doing something and i take a break to cut, and then get back to it, i have so much more patience, its like letting all the pressure and anxiety out with the blood... i've been doing this for about 10 years im 21 and i started when i was 10 going on 11, its always helped...my wrist looks VERY knarly, so i started cutting on my thighs (those scars dissapear nicely) but i dont want to do it anymore, i just wanna be able to deal with daily frustrations like normal people. but this has been my outlet for so long... i dont know what else there even is....
have you tried going to therapy for the cutting? some therapists are actually trained in how to deal with "self-harmers." i know, that there was a few therapists that ive had along the way, and they were amazing they have helped me a great deal. even though, i still do have slip-ups every now and again with cutting, its nowhere near as bad as it was before. i use to cut every single day. that went on for over a year. my arms look horrible. i wish that i wouldve never started, but its too late now. all i can do now, is when i am feeling upset, force myself to talk to someone, or seek some sort of "help". i say it like that, because "help" is different for different people. some may think all they need is an outlet, others may need inpatient psychiatric care. it varies from person to person. im no doctor, but in my opinion, i think you need to find what it is that best "helps" you. i hope this helped
honestly, im afraid to go to therapy for it, i just got custody of my son, and im afraid that they'll say that im not in the right state of mind or whatever to care for him....my self harming has never gotten in the way of me caring for him and he's never even seen it, but im still just really scared.
its only a matter of time before the right people figure out what is going on. and if they do find out, and see that you have not saught out treatment, it will be worse on you and your son. you cant take care of another being if you yourself cannot function properly. im always here if you need to talk