i get so annoyed at myself for having depression that i end up cutting my arm. i know it is not normal behaviour which makes me feel worse about it. i feel like i have to punish myself and it no longer hurts to cut my arm.
i know this isnt normal but i dont know what else to do.
i do have depression but i have everything i could want in life, i just dont understand why i feel like this and get angry when i think that so many other people are worse of than me but are able to cope. and then i take the anger out on myself
those thoughts are very understandable, of not knowing why you do it. however, you need to reverse the negativity. these thoughts happen to the best sometimes, and it is good that you recognize what is goingon. i think you should consider finding "the root of the problem" for example, figure out your triggers, or in other words, what sets you off to think like this... i hope this helps! and im here if you need to talk...
You should find something that makes you happy. Just one thing. It doesn't have to be anything big. Drawing, painting, pottery, it really doesn't matter. It just needs to be something that YOU like to do. You do it everyday. it should be seen as a stress relief. Something you look forward to doing everyday. It will help you cut less. You may not stop, but it does help, a lot.