I'm 21. WHen I was 7 my parents got separated and my safe world got broken. They restarted and reseparated lots of times. I was in the middle with my young bro. They finally decid to stay together but it scarred me anyway. I never had friends on school, because of I was a good stud. When I was 15 depression ruined my life and I want to therapy. After a year I was something like healed...But I ended school, entered the university and everything went wrong. I hated my career (music), and my bf was getting tired of my argues (sorry bad english) with my parents. Finally I left the career in the second year. Now I'm a housewife (parents house) and I still in love with my bf (We're since 3 years together). I feel worse with every day it passes. My family looks at me as s***, cause I don't work and don't study, no matter if I tidy the house or not. I fell that I'll never be good eneough fot hem. Sometimes I fell that my mom is narcissist, cuz she always makes me feel as it everything was my fault. I can't rely on my dad, cuz he's never worn the pants and he justs cares about what mom could think about. My bro isn't nice with me. And I feel that my beloved bf will start to get tired of me, cuz he always tells me that I should go living with him, but I know that he has lots of work and not much money, so I say that I'll think bout it...I feel so bad and can`t stop crying in the night, sometimes I think all day long in suicide as the only way to stop this. I think that I always do things wrong. Everything what I do means arguing with someone I love. I have no close friends whom to rely in. I'm always at home wishing to be alone. And the rest of my family is on mom's side, they never consider me as a sensible person...
I just want someone to tell me something nice. I can't carry this suffer alone.