HIthatoneguyyouveseen-
I am so sorry you are going through this. The first love is the one you will always remember, luckily as you grow older your version of things will change and you will remember only the good times.
Do you have someone to talk to about this? Mom Dad Grandparents brother sister any family r school counselor? these people have all been through this and know you best maybe you could talk with them about this?
You sound very mature and intelligent so I can say that this is the one of things in life..
Right now though, you must be kind to your self first. Remember relationships are between two people ans even the best relationships can be difficult.
Be happy and take pride in the fact you have a good, kind heart that can love so completely and will love again.
Everyone has been through this at least one or twice for the average human many times is the norm. Why do yo think there are so many sad love songs? They always sound good when your heart is aching, but sound like complete crap when your happy.. ahh the joys of life.
If you begin to become more sad, and the racing thoughts continue or you are thinking of getting lost or staying in bed for days PLEASE TALK TO SOMEONE FAST!!!
Sadness can sometimes become more than feeling blue and depression is not fun and can become serious.. Promise me you will talk to someone?