many women find it difficult to reach orgasm when having intercourse. Most have to have some stimulation to their clitoris, before they can reach their climax.
One method that works for some women is during intercourse , or foreplay, havimg their nipple sucked for around 10 to 20 mins along with clitoral stimulation or intercourse. it often helps them to reach their sexual climax and have their orgasm.

for some reason I dont like my nipples messed with cause my breast always hurt. And it takes me a good 45 minutes to reach close to climax. Anyother ideas?

Well, for myself, I rarely orgasm through intercourse. The guys usually do, but not me. I frequently require oral sex to achieve orgasm.

Wendy

I'm a guy, well endowed and I love to give oral 1st till my partner orgasms once or twice, then slide it in. I have heard that too about it being hard for a lot of females to get off on just penis alone.

More foreplay seems to be the universal cure if you are orgasmic but can't orgasm with a partner. An elevated level of arousal just helps a woman slip into gear more easily. Have you tried masturbating while he's inside of you? I think even with loss of sensitivity that learning to orgasm while he's inside of you will help you move towards a point where you can do so more reliably.