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how do i get over my baby's father & move? (Page 1)

how do i get over my baby's father my baby is born with a disablitiy.i ended the relationship because his father and i don't get along. so i am filling for child support and trying to move to another state which is my home state. i want to inform about the baby when ever something is wrong with the baby but some times he doesn't answer my calls and i don't want totally exclude his father from his life i just want the baby's father out of my personal life and if i have any other relationships.if anyone my know how i should go about moving to another state and keeping the baby's father out of my personal life but keep him in his sons life and how to let him know i'm over him and i really am moving on?
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First Helper Sweetbeck
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replied January 18th, 2009
Experienced User
Ending the relationship with him does not keep him from being a parent. If he excludes himself, you can't do anything about that. But, you can make him financially supportive and it seems that you have that part going. You can't make him answer the phone. As for your personal life if hes not involved what does it matter? Just don't keep him away from his son if he wants to be an active father.
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replied March 28th, 2009
same problem
i have the same problem i have been wih my baby father for almost 4 years he has never treated me well at all he has hitme pt e down all the above but for some reason i go back but i think it is finaly over now he moved to flordia to work i live in baltimore i ust think maybe its a good thing cause now i can relly get over him but the ony thing he keeps calling my house asken me questions about my personal life bu i tell him its none of his concern h says i have is daughter an he wants to no what we are doing idk please help
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replied May 8th, 2009
Supporter
i m assuming he still want you back. you have to be firm but nice about it. tell him y'all relationship is all about y'all child. your moving to another state, he should get the picture.
when you call him and he doesnt answer the phone, leave a message about the baby and let that be it. don't let him stress you out in any way. my friend is going through this right now, and i went through it also. now my son is 13y.o and i am so glad i dont have to talk to that guy any more.
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replied May 12th, 2009
NEW USER
I was with my babys dad for 5 years and i just recently ended it 6 months ago. He doesn't understand that i dont want him he was so mean to me and never helped out with our sons. So i thought the best thing for my sons and i was to end it i was doing it bymyself anyways and i didnt love him like i used too. Now i am getting him for child support and he tells me that i am selfish. How is that being selfish since we broke he hasn't given me one thing thats why i am getting child support he thinks that i am taking him away i am not because i very much so want him there for our sons. Does anyone have any advice for me?
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replied May 18th, 2009
can't get over him!
when he found out that i was having his kid , he was happy until a girl had got in the way. He told his whole family that it wasn't his kid. I'm facing this all alone and i want to dtae but i can't because all i think about his him. i'm lost and confused!! please help me!!
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replied June 1st, 2011
DO IT FOR THE BABY
girl..you need to find a way to move on with life for the sake of your baby who is clueless of whats happening. its not gonna be easy but swallow a stone and just be strong..make him see he made a n=mistake by not choosing you coz ur not dependant
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replied July 18th, 2009
soooo tired of being nice
im having same issue got with my now ex boyfriend an got preg at first he wanted to have kids an b a dad but things got weird he said his dad had a stroke an went back to new york an stay would come see me a few times while i was preg said he want to b here an wanted to send money but never was or did always made excuses y he couldnt move back an y he couldnt send money i lost my job so other then family helpin i had nothing he knew this last time he visited was a month b4 i had my daughter he said he had phnemonia so missed her birth and has yet to see her even when she was in the hospital 3 weeks old with rsv she stopped breathing 3 times once while i was on the phone with him said he couldnt get a flight out such crap shes 4 mo now still not seen her just empty promises on how he will come down soon we broke up in may im going after him for child support but he has threatened in the past to take her from me what should i do?
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replied October 1st, 2009
baby daddy
Gurl same bad things happened to me he can't take your kid away and take that off your shoulders I have a 10 month old and her dad is not in her life yes it makes me sad that he is taking that away from my daughter but your the one responsible for that little baby and you will see even if the court does not award you a reasonable amount at least you know that you have support for your child food, clothes, you just have to get all the helpful resources in your community every one out there is willing to help you just have to go find it. Stay at home moms are willing to watch your baby if you need to go to work for cheap you just have to pull yourself together because he is fine and not thinking but no one other than himself and you should just take him to child support becasue he has nothing to put against you...
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replied December 9th, 2009
LIFE GOES ON AND WE HAVE TO BE STRONG FOR OUR KIDS
Well things happen for a reason i been in the same situation with my son father but whats sad is that he is in trinidad and he can never come back he went to jail for rape my son is now 6years old i stood by his side the whole time he was in jail we he got out he treated me like dirt he dont call his son nothing after me being there for him he got another girl pregnant in trinidad so i been there with a no good man but u have to remember...behind every good woman there's a no good man who did her wrong and made her strong...if u need more advice hit me up
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replied February 10th, 2010
want to get over him too
I have the same problem I am trying to get over my son father but its soo hard becuz i love him soo so much. i cry everytime i think about him cuz i know he is not treating me how i want to be trerated.he pays for his daycare and sometimes give me money on the side. but it still doesnt seem to be enough becuz he has never had his son a day by himself. he use to tell me he love me now he said he love me but not in love with me it hurts me becuz im still in love with this man. he does alot for me and i do alot for him all i want is for us to be together or just leave it alone.he wont let me go becuz of our son.i dont want to see him again at all becuz i need alot of time to get over this.he doesnt want to be with me nemore and wont tell me why.
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Users who thank D1AMOND for this post: lina10 

replied February 27th, 2010
I can relate
I'm going thru the same thing w/ my sons father Diamond. But u no what I said to myself if he doesn't want me then why should I continue to want him, he's not the one for me. Don't hold a grudge and stop crying, I guarantee you he is not crying over you! My sons father also gives me money and he gets his son every now and then, but when he gives me money its $20 dollars here and there and when he gets his son it's when he feels like being bothered. If it interfers w/ his hanging out time he'll just leave my son w/ his mother. He doesn't want to be together but he still wants to be "cool" so he says. We need to separate he says and get overselves together b4 we even think about marriage. This is a bunch of bs and I had to see that. Still go to court, u have to think about the future of your child first then u, since u are the main one that's going to be raising, and providing for your child.
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replied March 26th, 2010
Baby Daddy Love
I'm having the same issue with my fathers son. Everything was cool before we had my son but after things went down hill. I mean his patterned changed and i noticted it quick. It was another girl involved, he treated me bad and hurt me even more than before my son. He lies and sleeps with different women and thinks thats cute but its disgusting to me. He recently moved in with someone and lied about it saying their just friends and he needs to get his money up. BS, I dont keep him away from our son, but he doesn't doing anything for him really but he's on his isurance. Do by diapers, food, clothes, dont call, if i did keep him away i wou;dnt be wrong because he is an ahole. I use to love him but now i can't bare to even see his face. We as women have to stop getting lost and confused over a man when they not trying to do right by us.
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replied April 6th, 2010
Re: want to get over him too
D1AMOND wrote:
I have the same problem I am trying to get over my son father but its soo hard becuz i love him soo so much. i cry everytime i think about him cuz i know he is not treating me how i want to be trerated.he pays for his daycare and sometimes give me money on the side. but it still doesnt seem to be enough becuz he has never had his son a day by himself. he use to tell me he love me now he said he love me but not in love with me it hurts me becuz im still in love with this man. he does alot for me and i do alot for him all i want is for us to be together or just leave it alone.he wont let me go becuz of our son.i dont want to see him again at all becuz i need alot of time to get over this.he doesnt want to be with me nemore and wont tell me why.



Hey,, im goin through the exact same. id love to chat more... can u email me ?
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replied February 14th, 2012
Well me an my baby father was qona make 3 yyeara next month an we broke up today hes alwayys.threting me.bad an he has even hit.me but i always forgibe.him.i was alwayys cofuse if it was that i loved.him or because.i.waned areal family for my daughter hes not a bad father but he's too lazzy.always had an excuses not to work all he does is play video games all day but for some reson when we broke up is killing me i dont wana lose him.but i'm not sure why.i need some ones help plzzzzz i.wanna forget.about him
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replied April 6th, 2010
Diamond, im feeling exactly how you are.. maybe we can help each other through this... im pretty good with advice but find it hard taking my own. wanna email, maybe we can both help each other X
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replied January 20th, 2012
I am having a real hard time dealing with the same issues..i love my daughters father so much and its been so hard for me to face the fact that we are no longer together...CAN SOMEONE HELP PLEASE
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replied May 6th, 2010
I feel all your pain! My sons father and I havent been living together for 4 years but I still do love him even though hes mean to me. Its really hard he gets him every other weekend and he is a decent dad so I still see him on Sundays when he drops him off. He then will either try to get me to have sex with him or tell me he still loves me. The bad part is until about a month ago I was still hooking up with him every now and then. So, Im in the process of getting over him he is dating another girl now, while still trying to hook up with me. Its hard because Id like to make sure the girl is nice because shes around my son but when I tell him this he thinks Im jealous and that starts more problems for me that I just dont have the energy to deal with. Anyway, Ive tried dating a bunch of times but I think I need to wait until Im completely over him.
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replied May 21st, 2010
I THOUGHT I LOVE HIM BUT DO I

I know how u feel girl i am 4 months pregnant and me and the babydaddy get along sometimes like yestersday which was May 20,2010 me and him was layin in the bed and we was cuddlying and he falls asleep.........and i am watchning tv so he wake's up and guess what he want SEX and i didn't feel like it so he was tomboust man i need some pu*** and that me and him didnt have sex in a while and i told him NO so he left and i was like y r u leaving and he mad up a lie so you no what i did let him totally be and leave and when he call me today im finna ingore him because he making it look like he just want sex all the time and that's not going to happen with quatta not even...........SO WHAT SHOULD I DO STAY OR JUST WAIT TILL THE BABY COME AND THEN GO
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replied May 26th, 2010
he has no excuse not to pick up your phone as you have ended the relationship with him, he has not ended it with his kid, i think you might need to file a case in the court for as he might not be a willing participant as i guess it, you should be prepared for a fight too as i think he might be from those people who are forced to do things, dont worry, make a strong case and dont back out of your case, it is necessary that your child knows the father and gets to meet him too!!
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replied July 3rd, 2010
Decision is MADE
This is an ongoing issue with me and my daughter's father because it has been six years and nothing has changed. I'm faithful to him, meaning there are no other guys that I allow my heart to myself to get close to. He says we will get married but I don't see anytime soon especially if there is constantly arguements between us. No matter if it's about him lying to me or he feels I'm being extra. I have come to realize that it's over and I'm ready to move on with my life.
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replied July 3rd, 2010
Decision is MADE
This is an ongoing issue with me and my daughter's father because it has been six years and nothing has changed. I'm faithful to him, meaning there are no other guys that I allow my heart to myself to get close to. He says we will get married but I don't see anytime soon especially if there is constantly arguements between us. No matter if it's about him lying to me or he feels I'm being extra. I have come to realize that it's over and I'm ready to move on with my life.
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replied November 4th, 2011
MOve on?
I think we all have the same problem. I went to stay with my mother when i had the baby. I was 8months pregnent when we said gd bye at the airport. 2weeks later he lived with an other women he didnt admit it but i am sure that was the case n reason why I couldnt return home with my new born baby. He is a millioner, and yet never once sent to the baby money or helped i was even working for him for free online. Such a disapoinment. I loved him very much and propably I still do. Find it extremly difficult to move on even though I live now with my new bf who loves us very much. I went back to university as well and finished but I never had the chance to talk to him or show him his baby and it is killing me and killing my recent relationship as well. His new bf sens me daily pics of our home where she is now from fablouse holidays with my babys father pics with his expensive cars and I feel so horible... I cant move on. Help!!! What can I do?
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replied July 20th, 2010
my sons dad, he is really good to my son, i mean honestly he is, its just that i still holding onto him because i want a family life for my son, i dont want him to have a stepfather i want his real daddy to be with him, i dont know what to do how do i let do, i see him every other day, and my son goes by his dad ever other weekend so i still have to see him, there's no room to let go and not see him, omg wht do i do
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replied November 11th, 2011
needing a little help
Hello. My name is Crystal i am 25 have been with my sons father for 7 years, all through our relationship we were fighting about the same small things.. having two children with disabilities has had us growing apart for awhile now.. recently about 4 days ago we decided to call it quits. I see him everyday and he is a great father which makes it even harder. Im drownding in my own pain... I was wondering how ur life has changed and if u were able to move on? Thank you
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