There really are no symptoms specific to HIV. A rash could be HIV, or the weather change or change in laundry soap or diet. Any number of things.
Your situation is serious because it not only involves you and your wife but a child to come.
I think at this point you should both be tested for everything. HIV, STDs, everything. Tell your wife that you are fed up with the situation and would like for both of you to be tested for everything.
I read that Staphylococcus aureus symptoms may present as boils. I had boils but nobody checked me for HIV until later they found out I had AIDS from a chest infection. It is hard to say what is what without a test.
That will clear one thing and then move on to the next. I don't think you contracted HIV from your encounter 4 years ago but you are obviously worried about it.
Take heart my friend.
Always
Muthoni (Mson)