If she is considering not having the divorce and she is the one that brought it up in the first place, then of course, you need to give it time. Marriage is really something that takes years to settle into and is no easy thing. You should also consider not jumping in to a divorce also for the sake of your children.

No time is being wasted here, and you need to stop viewing it as such since it isn't helping matters. When you got married you pledged your life to her....and now to your children. A stable family for the sake of the children is never wasted and every day is a learning experience. I think it is very hard on the family for your life in the military, but it should be making you stronger.

If you truly love your wife and your children, and you want it to not be a waste of time, there has to be the willingness to commit on both sides. Your children are already committed: how about you?

Sorry when i said waste of time, it's just I don't know we have our problems, and there's so many things I want to talk to her about, like with my deployments, things I did, saw and all that stuff but I can't with her cause she would never understand. When I come home from a deployment all I want is time with her and my kids, that affection, sex, time, etc. I think she has gotten use to me not being there with her, not much I can do about that. I love my kids don't get me wrong, my oldest is 4 and the baby is 1yr, just don't want them seeing their parents argue all the time. Don't know what I should do, like I said I love her but she is not trying here hardest to make me happy in so many way's.