heartbroken after being cheated on after 9 years Posted: 06-05-08 18:17pm
I cant eat, I cant drink, I cant sleep and
when I do sleep I dont want to wake up.
My heart is breaking...one minute I feel
stronger and the next weak. My partner of
9 years became distant and treated me
badly for a month between april/may, i
knew something was wrong and by the end of
may I had found out that he had slept with
a girl from his work.Im only 24 and he is
only 25 but we have been through alot
together and I really do love him to bits.
I also found loads of messages he had
sent her and his phone bill was over £100
due to text messages he sent her.Ive never
felt more low.I feel alone, used, ashamed
and hurt.He sent her messages saying he
was breaking up with me and that he had
feelings for her.She said she was getting
back with her boyfriend.I wasnt supposed
to find out, but my detective work helped
and I did. he said he loved me and wanted
to work it out.i spent two weeks with my
sister...in a daze....crying.
I recieved phone calls from him that were
nasty and he seemed to have no remorse.he
wanted to know what was happening with our
flat e.t.c.after two weeks i came home, he
stayed a few nights on the couch after
being out..prob with her.I found pictures
of her and his other friends on his phone
and he still said he hadnt seen her.he
said he wanted a second chance and to work
things out.he hugged me, kissed me and
then hugged me all night.told me he loved
me and was sorry.then we had sex and fell
asleep together.in the morning we didnt
really speak and he got up and got
dressed.he said he did want to try and
work things out.ive not heard much over
the past few days and he had addmitted his
head is very mixed up.im so confused,..i
cant eat or sleep, im boerd, im a mess and
i feel as though im going insane....i need
help and i feel so alone.....i dont know
what to do.
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worrywart01
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 May 2008 Posts: 701 Location: ,
Thanks: 64
Thanked:8
Posted: 06-05-08 18:29pm
9 years is a long time, i cant imagine how
you must be feeling right now...but you DO
NOT deserve to be pushed aside while he
has his fling..though maybe you two are at
a point in your relationship that you need
a break...you've been dating since what
16? And to not know anything different
besides each other, maybe he's just
confused as to what he wants...if its
meant to be you two will get back
together..but i think for now, trying to
hold on to him won't help...a break sounds
like its needed...i personally have always
told myself as well that if i caught my bf
cheating...that would be something i NEVER
tolerated...bc trust is something hard to
get back once its lost...I'm so sorry to
hear what you're going through, but keep
your head up and know that you deserve to
be treated MUCH better than that..if he
were interested in another girl he should
have been man enough to break it off with
you before cheating...i know not much
helps right now but stay strong
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melancholydaye
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 26 Feb 2008 Posts: 87 Location: ,
Thanks: 7
Thanked:9
Posted: 06-05-08 19:21pm
we've all been through it, but at least
you found out early due to detective work.
my bf of 2 1/2 years cheated on me a lot
and I didn't find out until after the
relationship was over. 9 years is a long
time, but you should pack up your or his
things and keep moving on, try not to
ponder it too much, and you have a right
to be disgusted with him..just put it into
your head that you are better off without
him and move on, thats what i did and i'm
better off now than when i was with my ex
pondering on what he was doing all the
time...you guys just need to seperate, and
if he trys to come back to you, take it
slow. just stay stong and get out there
and enjoy your single life. your still a
young independant woman. best of luck.
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Sukki
Experienced User , Rather EHEALTHy
Joined: 05 Sep 2008 Posts: 89
Thanks: 8
Thanked:2
and my family case.. Posted: 09-08-08 12:36pm
my sister was married to this guy for 10+
years, i think 11. then he got wif some
prostitute and then she decided to divorce
coz he kept taking her money for years and
she wanted to get back at him by dating
another guy (b4 divorce), then he went all
abusive and stuff..so she finaly decide to
divorce..
and my other sister.. 6 yrs perhaps...
also div..husband cheated..
and me i dunno what im doing, all these is
a big carving into my heart.. pain.. i
feel i m losing myself. i get cheated,
forced sex with guys who had gf's, taken
advantage... so what if i found real love
(2 guys) at 22 im still labeled by
worrywart as a moral-less person and
scolded.. and how many times i did it with
my exes is a bit too much..i seem to yield
too much to guys...coz im really
scared..my mum tinks im stupid coz im
weak.. i got an ab at 18 yr old too..
everything is jus a shame in my life..
maybe i shud just quit this forum..maybe
its not for me..i m not from the us or
uk..
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worrywart01
Active User, Really EHEALTHy
Joined: 15 May 2008 Posts: 701 Location: ,
Thanks: 64
Thanked:8
Posted: 09-08-08 16:42pm
??? don't go talking about me in other
threads saying I have labeled you when I
have done no such thing...I dont
appreciate it
