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Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum > he says he doesnt love me anymore :(????
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Q: he says he doesnt love me anymore :(????
asked by: aeonflux2025 on September 8th, 2009
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hi all, im in a very big dilemma! ok, so ive been seen this guy for 8 months, and our relationship was kinda complicated. we werent one of those couples that broke up and got back together again all the time , we didnt even fight! recently he broke up with me because he says "he doesnt love me anymore". now the situation that we in was difficult, he was acting father to his best friends baby and they were planning to have another one. i know that sounds bad, but the situation worked reasonably well. so theres that, which means he didnt have very much time and energy to put into our relationship.
he also told me that since becoming father to his best friends child that his emotions were kinda numb and he was stressed and tired all the time, which meant he didnt have very much of a sex drive. he is also on anti-depressents which numbs your feelings, and he recently switched to a new one which was very strong. i kind of have a feeling that the medication might have something to do with him not feeling that way about me anymore?
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missyTrouble
replied on September 8th, 2009
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if you can talk to him, ask him why he doesnt love you anymore, ask him what your doing right or wrong! dont just stand there and let youself be torn! as for the anti depressants, they might be affecting it, depending on what hes taking, or it could be an excuse!
hope this helped! x
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aeonflux2025
replied on September 9th, 2009
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well he said that he doesnt know why, he just started feeling this way about a month ago (around the time the medication changed) then last week was a bad week because he was doing things that i felt were a bit insensitive. he was avoiding staying over at my place, he went out 2 nights in a row with his friends and didnt invite me. i had been pulling away from him since the weekend b4, because we went and stayed at his parents place. when we were there he acted like i wasnt there, gave me no recognition. he does have issues with his parents, they never showed emotions towards eachother of acted like a loving family (hence why hes on anti depressents) so he cant show love that well. but i feel like he based his decision on that weekend and the bad week we had. when i tried asking him how he really felt, he said he was sad and lonely. he also said he had seen something i would have liked and thought about buying it for me, after he broke up with me!!
when i ask him why he thinks this has happened, and try and give him possible reasons, or other points of view on it, he gets angry at me and tells me not to question his decision making!
why would he feel sad, lonely, and hurt about this if he didnt want to be with me?
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W0LF
replied on September 9th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
Hey aeonflux2025
Good move getting away from him! I mean I think that's what you're needing to hear. There's nothing you posted here that isn't an endless list of red-flags for a relationship. You're describing an emotionally crippled man with intimacy issues who is unavailable and fights with you all the time. He has a very unorthodox relationship with a child and mother. I don't think you can have a more doomed relationship without Drug Addiction, Chronic Abuse or Schizophrenia. This is the way you describe a man you're happy to have escaped not a man you want to get back together with.

I think you really need to take a few weeks off from him to seriously evaluate the future of that relationship, how it fulfills you and if it's healthy for you.
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