hi kim. i'm so sorry you're in this situation. i don't have much good advice to give you, but i'll tell you what i can.

1st. your self respect is an issue, and you need to work on that. if it was me, i wouldn't give him any sex unless he started to prove to me that he is wanting to continue a relationship with me. otherwise he's just using you as his c@m dump (please excuse me for saying that, but it is true).

2nd. i admire you so much, because even though you see yourself as weak, i see you as very strong. just by virtue of the fact that you didn't get an abortion even though he pushed you to tells me you're strong. also the issue with the lease tells me you're smart AND strong.

god bless you! i hope things work out for you. worst case scenario, it ends up being you and your beautiful baby, and you make your own family of two. i hope however it works out, that you end up being happy with the outcome. i'll pray for you!
good luck sweetie,
jasmine

My babys father left me at 3 months. He left with out a word and looking back its the best possible thing i couldve done. I met a man that loves me and my son and he is helping me raise him and treats him as his own son. YOU need to get over him. Dont be engaging in sex with him or even see him for that matter. If he walks out on you and this baby you are carrying of his, it is HIS LOSS. Do not berate yourself and treat yourself as If you are not worth it because you are. He is scum for leaving you. He doesnt care about you and just sees you as someone he can go to and will always be there. He wont truly love you this way, he just knows youll be there waiting and thinks he can go about his life then come back to you and youll be waiting. You need to forget about this loser and start focusing on your life with this little one that is inside you. Men will come and go and nothing will ever be more constant in your life than the one you are creating right now. nothing is more important than that child. You need to pick yourself up by your boot straps and get going and trust me hun you will find that man that is going to love that baby and you unconditionally more than that man ever could. You are worth being loved, that baby is worth being loved, and you need to remember that the next time he tries to get into a hook up with you.

Remember you are worth it and this little baby is going to be depending on you for strength, practice it now. Because hun trust me once a loser always a loser and if he didnt want that baby now its a pretty good indicator hes not going to want anything to do with it or you later.

Kim, I can tell you are a smart person and from what i can tell of the picture you are also a beautiful young woman. Don't let anyone make you feel like less than that just because you are going to be a mother and definately never let a man treat you like less than you deserve because there is going to be a man out there that will treat you like a queen and that is what every woman deserves . You wouldnt want to miss the opportunity being tied up on a chain by this guy.
Good luck on your pregnancy and if you ever need to talk, message me. --- Kyra

Why are you giving into him? If he left you don't worry about it, there is plenty of guys out there and you are bound to meet one....

Here is my problem, I understand he asked for an abortion, which he is allowed a say but it is your final decision. The problem is that you are probably going to request child support from him, when he didn't want a kid to begin with.

If one isn't prepared for the potential of having to raise a child, they have no business having sex. He isn't going to be victimized by her having her baby. That's a part of her AND HIM, and if he doesn't own up to his end of the deal NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, he is wrong.

If you can't pay the consequences, then don't have sex.
Jasmine

Totally agree with jazzy on this diamondsz... no glove no love to put it old school. Hes not the victim here and it always bothers me to see people with this attitude. Even if he doesnt want the child it is still his price to pay for a mistake he made. If every guy could get out of child support by playing the victim theyd do it. Its not fair for the guy to get out scott free and the mother to be left with all the expenses for the child. It took 2 to make and it takes 2 to take care of a child. That is the way life is. At least she will be taking care of it for him, he should just think of it as her way of payment for services rendered watching a child he doesnt want any thing to do with.

Sex is also recreational as well as procreational, the fact that one cannot force a woman to have a kid or an abortion because she is allotted choice but a man is not allotted choice is against human rights of equality, must be the liberal in me.

Double standard don't you think?

So women can burn men because they are damned if they do and damned if they don't, its like saying "only women can have kids but you have to pay, since you dont have a choice.

So mny guys are burned in society with this mentality only a small percentage of women actual suffer the repercussions of part time custody or none at all and in the end, we want what they have but don't want to work for it, great work.

If women have a right to choice then so should men, its only fair!

sex is recreational that can be true but everyone knows the consequences of that form of recreation. saying.that this is not right is the equivelent of saying that someone who gets hurt while running in a pool area with a posted no running sign is the victim.everyone knows sex can make babys. if your recreation leads to procreation it is not only 1 persons fault, its both. the mother already has to deal with thescreaming child24 hours a day, the least the father could do is throw her a few bucks for full time babysitting

my son's father left me when i was 6 months pregnant. i was so hurt i cried in front of my mom. he wanted to play around and wasnt serious. we got back together when the baby was born, but they say "love cant pay bills" and i needed diapers and he wasnt working and just playing nentendo. so that got old, i fell out of love with him and moved on...at that time he was ready to play dad, but it was too late. he seen his son, but it was over.
my son is now 13 y.o and his dad is a dead beat jerk, but my son thinks he's superman.
how are you going to get over someone that doesnt deserve you if your sleeping with him.
y'all might get back together b/c of the baby. but i question what kind of father or man he will be after his actions he's showing.

Although you sort of have a point equaility for all and everything i still think that men have a responsibitly. For woman there is one last choice if they do have an unwanted pregnancy and men have no say in that choice i get that BUT you knew this BEFORE you had unprotected sex so you can't do the deed and then start crying at how unfair life is.Also the woman pay a price too you know because if the baby is unplanned and the man wants to abort then its pretty likely that the woman wont see that guy again so the physical,emotional and half the financial responsibility lands right at her feet.

i been with my ex for 5 years and he used condoms faithfully, he didnt want any kids. so i believe the responsible way is to use a condom all times, make sure theyre mate doesnt want kids so it wont be an issue, and using birth control.

if a guy is having sex and spreading his seeds inside, and he's crying afterwards, i have no sympathy. most men want to feel the real thing.

I understand a lot.. too I am 8 months pregnant with a 3 year old son. Not working and barely making it by. My husband up and left me for his friends and his mother because i needed his help and he wanted his freedom to do what he wanted. It will be hard for a while espicially with your hormones running wild. there are days when I am happy but then I just want to cry all day or even weeks but when my son and i spend time together and i feel my baby move them 2 make me realize how better my life will be with out him and the men in my life that will always love me are my sons