Medical Questions > Relationships > Relationships and Marriage Forum

Group Sex

My b/f of over 10 years is obsessed with the idea of watching me have sex with someone else.

Things weren't going well so as a Christmas Gift I suggested a three-some (this has been something he has talked about for years). We set it up - met with the person and all went well. However, it is NOT something I wish to do on a regular basis.

Since then he has become obsessed with it - wants to see me with 1, 2, 3 guys at a time while he watches, films, etc., and partakes as well. He is on the computer 24/7 looking for people to set up encounters with. I have told him this is not my idea of a good time and his response is I put no effort into the relationship by not wanting to partake.

How do i get him to understand this is not something i'm comfortable with or am I truly not putting effort in by not wanting to partake.
Did you find this post helpful?
|

User Profile
replied July 12th, 2010
Community Volunteer
Hi abby_2919 and welcome to ehealth: I am having a hard time understand why when things weren't going well that you went this route to make him happy...In other words you pacified him...Now he is on the computer 24/7 trying to find some group sex...How do you make him understand that you don't want this nor will not do it is to leave him...IMO, what you are seeing and what he wants to do is his idea of a perfect relationship....Take care...

Caroline
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied July 12th, 2010
Thanks CarolineEF - any idea how common 3-somes or more in a relationship is? Am I "prudish" not wanting to partake?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

User Profile
replied July 12th, 2010
Community Volunteer
Hi Abby: I guess more than anything that this depends upon what the two people involved in this partnership prefer...If both agree that it is good for them, then so be it...It would never be for me...I am totally satisfied with my husband and our sex life...I would not let another woman near him...He feels the same about me...Are you prudish?...No...However, there are people that are into this way of life that might say yes...I married one man...I will not be shared for any amount of love nor money....What I have is special and nobody, but nobody could make me change my mind....

Honey, this is my story of life...We will have been married 53 years this Fall...I can say without any reservation whatsoever that we as hot as any couple on this Forum...IMO, when you have to bring others into the bedroom or mating chamber, you have got problems....Where do you go from there?....I send you my best wishes...

Caroline
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied July 12th, 2010
wow - 53 years - congratulations - and thanks again
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied October 21st, 2010
Abby,
Dump him as he has some serious issues.He is failing to understand the difference between fantasy and reality.If he loved you the last thing he would want to see is three guys with you.He is treating you as an object not a person and the concern is what is next once this fetish passes?
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 10th, 2011
I think you either have to be into that lifetyle or not... i am not sure that such a lifetyle is fit for TWO PEOPLE who love each other(or are suppossed to love each other) ~ why would someone want to give their partner away like that?

I mean if people are single and they mess around that way it is another story perhaps...
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied January 28th, 2013
Experienced User
So you laid with another man just to please you boy friend lol..and of course you got nothing out of it did you ha ha.
|
Did you find this post helpful?

replied June 10th, 2013
this is unmoral behavior leave him
if you do this of course you are ashamed yourself very soon
|
Did you find this post helpful?
Quick Reply