I made friends with this person on-line and we got to chatting via e-mail and also occasional phone call. She even sent my little one some presents and i sent her a book, called "The Secret" because i thought it might help her. Shes pretty depressed and cant leave her home unless its to a doctors appt. She thinks theres something seriously wrong with her but i think shes just majorly depressed. Anyway after chit-chatting for a few weeks now, I kinda had enough of her constant BS but i didnt say anything, just tried to tell her that whatever problem she had would only get worse by taking xanax and drinking as in the long run, they are both depressants. She has a loving husband who seems to just keep her in her bubble. I do feel bad for her but what made me realise that she doesnt really want help. After i sent her a cheery letter saying i hadnt drunk for a week. Ive had a bit of a drink problem so this is quite a big deal for me. I also told her that things were really looking up for me in my life etc etc and she wrote back saying, thanks for the chats but we dont have anything in common anymore. This really threw me and upset me and im like, what now im not depressed anymore you dont want to talk to me anymore?? Well point is i then wrote her a long letter, a very harsh letter and i dont know if i did the right thing. Basically i told her that if she really wanted to change shed need to stop abusing her medication, get out her lazy butt out of bed and go face the world and to keep trying to get help. I thought shed become a friend, not that i need one, i have plenty but i liked her and did worry about her. From what i could gather shes been like this for the last 3-4 years. Any comments or suggestions? Did i do the right thing by sending that letter? Will it make or break her or did she just delete it, who knows!!!