She's clearly formed an emotional connection with him if she's continuing to pursue the relationship even after you've learned about it.

The fact that she hit the online dating sites as soon as you left town speaks volumes.

I'm sorry.

Hang in there, pal

I appreciate your insight. Coming from outside the box is what I need to hear.
Thanks You

I think you have to warn her if she do that again you will break up with her.or if you don't love her break up with her rite now,or if you love her and enjoy being with her and have sex with, but never be concern in your mind and you find another chick and start a new relationship too.to forget loving her.
I am a guy we spoiled these girls lets behave like them.

As much as we want the other half to go thru what they put us through...it does us no good as the damage has already been done. Yea revenge feels pretty good....but still doesnt heal.

I dont think she takes your guys' relationship serious. If your serious and want more with her...I wouldnt rely on her. Considering she signed up to a dating site only 4 days of not hearing from you. Unfortunatly, what I think she is doing is finding someone else, but keeping you around incase her plans fail. Its happened to me a couple of times...now Im a pro at seeing it before it happens. I would like to think that women arent as scandalous as men are...but its definitly and obviously not true.

I would take a break from her. Let her know that you dont deserve to be put on the backburner or the lies! If she really does love you...she will realize what she lost and she will come back with apologies and HOPEFULLY a lesson learned. But my advice is...if she does come back...MAKE HER PROVE that she really IS sorry and dont give in so fast...make her work for it or else when and if she does it again...she will remember how easy it was to get you back.

A real woman will respect you and your commitment to your job. She will also WAIT FOR YOU...especially if its only 4 days. A real woman wont lie to you, or keep things from you. With a real woman...you would hold trust and love and companionship. You dont deserve this at all and I know its got to hurt! Dont keep doing this to urself!

Remember: Love is not supposed to hurt...it is supposed to enhance what is already within you.

I hope your happy with your decision

I thank you so much for the angle to look at the situation. I find it very helpful.

Sorry dude. I would not trust her very much if I were you. You are best off seperating yourself emotionally from her.

I have been trying just that, and with you telling me the same actually gives me more power and motivation. Thanks. You guys are all great.

DEFINITELY cheating and i would NOT trust her..this sitation definitely needs to be discussed and you need to make it crystal clear that if shes gonna be fooling around on a dating site you're not gonna put up with it...personally, idk if I'd be able to trust her again...but thats totally up to your discretion

I would agree with the above posters, If she all the sudden went on a dating site as soon as you left town, yeah that tells ya something. As far as I am concerned if you are in a relationship you are happy in, you dont go on dating websites...if you are already dating someone...why would you do it? To me there is no explanation... I would say buh bye hun!

good luck and hope all works out for you!

I like your reply proudmama!!! Exactly...Why would she??? Thanks

I read these and cry because I was the girlfriend and I loved this man more than life! I gave him my all! It was not 4 days but 6 . I want the man that is supposedly so in love with me want to hear my voice or text me lil note just because Im on his mind. He failed to tell all of you that I tried to reach him by phone, text, email and nothing! I know he was getting...He also failed to tell you that he didnt even tell me he got text messaging before he left! His mom told me! He never gave me intinerary info or hotel but I didnt push issue...I wanted to trust him! He called on day 6, not day 4 and said "I love you" in a whispering voice. The call lasted about 1 min. He would of not called if I hadnt text a message saying " I know what you did" that was referring to being spied on after he left! So many weird and unexplained things happen to me as soon as he left! I investigated the company he was going to work for...they merged with another company of any in 2005 but he didnt know that....I have been lied to by him on several occasions and yes I told a couple but they never had to do with a man! I never ever ever cheated on him and til this day have stayed faithful with exception of 3 phone calls. The calls and very few emails were about us!! I never wanted anyone else! the only reason I got on date site was pure saddness!!! My heart has ached for so long now! I hurt every minute, everyday!He has promised me the world and then gets mad and all he ever said doesnt happen. I hung in there! Tried doing all the right things. Last summer he has 800 xtra miles on his car in 1 week when he was suppose to be home 60 miles away! His excuse...I was racing! I bought it because I love him so not because Im a stupid blonde! So much I could say about what he did, what I did and thats just going to make me rehash and Im so exhausted emotionally, physically...he has Russian fiance now...he went there for more reasons than work if he worked at all! All i know is she got his time and I always have to beg! In 9 mos. I wanted so bad for us to take a weekend getaway! Til this day, it hasnt happened...so yes, I talked on phone, cried on phone and stay alone and wait and wait and wait! I showed him unconditional love because it was real! I would of died for that man....I dont even want to live without him! So as he thanks you for all your input, just know, the girlfriend has been punished enough! Send him congrats and happiness with his new family! Everyone deserves to be happy!

lilwhtrshn
Thank you for waiting to hear my side of my story. If patience were a virtue, we would be good, however, I'm glad this lack of virtue reared it's ugly head before I asked for your ring finger.
Thanks again.
Gueary
skullmaster333

Not to start a war here. That will probably get us kicked off site. I only want opinions. lilwhtrshn failed to admit 2 important points...1: during those 9 months, she promised to quit selling illegal narcotics. She is a dealer, yes. I caught her secretly receiving and selling an additional 4 times during our dating spree. 2: she was an alcoholic before we met. She did slack on this habit pretty well with exception to a few times ( going to her local hangout with friends. Yes she would get drunk and drive who knows where.
I will add a 3rd: When I contacted lady in Russia, I already knew she had joined dating site and began conversations with him.
We could go back and forth all day I'm sure but I feel this is enough info for all of you to go from, unless, she wants the plot to thicken????

I just feel like this relationship is very unhappy and hanging by a thread..it seems neither of you are happy..now if you want to sit down and talk about it and work things out thats fine..you want opinions? heres mine...boyfriend that didnt call:theres really no excuse not to call your girlfriend for 4 days..I know that if I didn't hear from my bf for 4 days I'd be flipping out bc there isnt a day that goes by that we dont at least talk on the phone..HOWEVER..with that said, I for sure would not immediately go looking for some strange guy to comfort me on a dating site especially..there is absolutely NO excuse in my book to create a dating profile when you are currently in a relationship bc yes..its cheating...if you aren't happy, figure that out, end the relationship you're in and then move on and do the dating site thing...but..as i said before, it sounds like this relationship is very unhealthy and you two should discuss where to go from here or even if you wish to move forward in the relationship

Your reply seems so very professional and thought through. Thank you for taking the time. It won't be a waste.

i wish the best for you both whatever you decide

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