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Feeling lonely and lacking confidence

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Hi Guys,
Im completely new here and throwing myself to your mercy! I have always been an individual who suffers low confidence. However as a Psychology Graduate I know its important to embrace my fears and to think positively. But I dont find that easy. I have just completed a masters degree where I got a distinction. Pretty impressive but for some reason I still really lack confidence in my own ability. On this course I stumbled through presentations with dread!!

My problems now stem from the fact that I have moved from one side of the counrty to the other to live with my boyfriend. Our relationship is going great, but he is actually the only person I have here. He works full time, and I currently have no job.
I Miss my family terribly, but if i bring it up I feel guilty on my boyf. We had to move here because of his job. When I first moved here I was doing uni work so I had a purpose in my day. Now I have finished and I feel lost and with no reason to get out of bed. I have applied to jobs with no luck. I think this makes me more anxious and low in confidence! Also where I live now is much more rural so jobs are lower.

I feel I don't know how to make friends. I make these easily when in the right situation but I can;t seem to meet people. I know my boyfriends friends but thats it. I am really bad at worrying what others think of me. Some days I wont leave the house even to go to the post office because I think people may talk about me! Its really getting me down. I dont want to ruin my relationship through me feeling hopeless.

Does ne1 else ever feel like this. No matter how many times my boyf or parents tell me to have more confidence I just cant. Im young and should be enjoying life, but feel like its passing me by!

Thanks for letting me vent Smile
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replied September 29th, 2009
I understand that you have been having trouble adjusting to your move and graduation from school. Such a transition can be difficult. You may want to find a therapist to talk to about your feelings and change in behavior.


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replied October 5th, 2009
It sounds like you may have Social Phobia. You might want to read up on this condition and see if it fits.
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replied November 9th, 2009
i get like that too, ive moved with a new baby and fiance, and dont know a soul. but it does help having the baby at times to move my ass outta bed every morning lol. i get the fear of going to the grocery store a lot lately. i do believe its anxiety because you are feeling alone, and perhaps singled out, for being a stranger person in a new place. you'll have good days and bad days, but never say to yourself theres no reason to get out of bed in the morning, theres always a reason even if is just to do a pile of laundry, or go for a walk, i find exercise really gets rid of my anxiety a great deal. infact one thing that really spurs me along is one walk in the neighborhood a day. you go by other people on the street, and see your not alone, other people are doin things by themselves too. its a ll about challenging yourself, face your fears smoothly, go to the post office more often if our scared of it, and strike u a conversation with the clerk so that you see them face to face and dont wonder what they think, dont live inside your head there is nobody in there but you, and that is lonley and depressing. we only really get an impression of ourselves if we continue to get feedback from other people. if you had moved there completely solo i bet you would have met more people by now, bc you would have pushed yourself, i think sometimes when we are with someone we forget the importance of being social.
to start join a club, anyone be it dancing or books or whatever. dont think theres something wrong with you because this tends to lend to the problem, what your feeling is normal, and wil get easier, probably already has, i could have wrote ur message a month ago!

goodluck
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