I had a tough childhood. I know theres many out there with a tough life and mine isnt as bad. But I am still depressed. I have stopped taking care of my self all together for years now. I've gained weight. I've ben denying that I am depressed.
I am 21 and cant depend on my parents. They actually depend on me for everything. I have a young brother who depends on me alot. I am in a relationship but I still feel alone and not understood no matter how much I try to express myself. I have quite a few bills to pay and not enough work. My parents , brother, friend and boyfriend constantly depend on me but I feel I have no one to catch me if I fall. Im always there when needed but dont feel I have the same from anyone.I constantly am on the defensive and always feel taken for granted. I work hard in my job but my efforts go unnoticed.
I am known as the optimist according to my friend ( my one friend, I've pushed away others) but I am only optimistic when it comes to someone elses life that isnt me. I feel a gap growing between me and the world. I am tired. Stressed, overwhelmed, sad, and just feel down and hopeless.
I feel like I am walking with chains on my shoulders and my nerves are peaking. I am getting nervous twitches and stress related migraines and have trouble sleeping. I have no money for doctor or treatment. I feel stuck. What do I do..