I am new here and this is the first time I've written on a forum. I just want to talk to someone. I'm not really sure where to begin. Here goes- I was diagnosed with bipolar depression about 12 years ago. As I was feeling stronger and better, I came off medication after 5 years. After 5 years (with a few ups and downs) of not taking anything I started feeling scarily depressed again. I am now taking Sertraline which has helped me a great deal. However though, recently I have been finding life difficult. I'm thinking about the future a lot and it's all very black and negative. I feel I'm a failure and it wasn't meant to be like this. This scares me and I feel alone. I want to be able to stop thinking this way because I know it is stopping me from moving on. I hope someone can help.
I am very sorry to read that you are having a difficult time at present.
I am wondering about your diagnosis. Meaning that you have not mentioned any "high" periods but rather symptoms of depression. These "high" periods usually go with Bipolar Disorder.
It is not usual for anti depresants to be the sole medication to be given to someone who has Bipolar Disorder. Usually doctors start of with a mood stabiliser first and then if necessary add an anti depressant. They may also try other medication.
It may be a good idea for you to go back "to square one" and seek another diagnosis.
However, what appears to me to be the most important factor at the moment is for you to contact your doctor and let him know how you are feeling at present. He may suggest other medication and/or psychotherapy.
Oh, I am not a medically qualified person. Thus what you are reading is coming from a lay person.