Falling In Love With Someone 1000's Of Miles Away (Page 3)

Speaking to someone who I seem to get along with well in Norway, I wouldn't say it's love. The expectations aren't set. They seem to like me. Have no expectations and so on. I wonder if the chance one day to meet him will happen. I think even though someone lives far away, you still haven't had that one on one meeting in person, which can be nerve wracking. I would say don't jump into sex too quickly. He sounds nice but some people have had not so nice experiences. So be aware that people sometimes change I suppose.

OH MY GOD! I can't believe how much people is in this situation.. I'm in a similar one haha I'm from Argentina and he's from Turkey.
I met him around a year ago over the internet.. And now We CAN'T stop talking to each oher everyday. Even when the time difference is a problem, he's always spending his bedtime to talk to me more than 4 hours everyday.
I can't explain very well all these feelings. We've been talking to each other more than a year ago, and we realized we're soulmates.
We're still in the University, so we can't pay the airplain tickets yet.. But he has told me, he'll visit me in two or three years n_n when we finished the university.
Yes yes I know.. Looks like a long of time.. But I've talked to him for more than 13 months.
I can't hide I'm in love with him. :')
We believe in dreams, we believe in each other, we belive in Fate.. And well I have a huge story with him.
What do you think about it? ^-^

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OK it took, lol. I read all of the responses and just wanted to add my 2 cents. My "guy" is in Mexico and I'm in the US. It's been a month which seems like forever and he is already holding back feelings by using "I LIKE you a lot", lol. I'm very analytical and I question and observe everything. Yes, we hit it off and we have a great deal in common and he says the most wonderful things that NO ONE has ever said to me in my life so it is easy to fall for someone like that because we are speaking from our "higher selves", we get emotionally and spiritually connected but forget that "physical chemistry" is also a major factor. I had once said to him, "I wonder if all the guys who've been eying me for the past year and a half feel the same as you do". The difference between my guy and them is that my guy "read" my thoughts online and responded because of them, whereas these other guys I pass by every day don't know them because we're each probably waiting for the other to make the first move; a sad yet true observation with the way we socialize. I also think the same dynamic applies with people smitten with one another from different countries. We're both thinking we want them to move to our country. He's a doctor and has already told me he would have to go to school another 2 years if he came over here and it is true because my ESL students are doctors who can't practice in the US just yet, and I couldn't bear to have him do that; even for me. I also have to consider whether I would leave everything and move to Mexico. He already stated that he is in this for the long haul and has offered to come visit me first, which sweetens the pot. I think we all share the similar question of, "What are you really willing to do for love?". I also asked him, as well as myself, "Why can't you meet someone in your own country?" We both are "universal souls" and believe love can be found anywhere, and I've always felt my "soul-mate" would be from another country because people from other countries show me such effortless love upon meeting me whereas Americans have been the cruelest and I grew up here,so here the universe has answered my heart's desire with this sweet man, as it asks me, "So what am I going to do?"

Prior to my meeting him my social life was in a slump for quite some time, which I'm sure relayed itself in my aura, which can alter ones attractiveness. Since experiencing him, and my surge of happiness, which again shows in the aura, I notice how guys are coming out of the woodwork and smiling more and approaching me more, they're just not talking. I am also mindful of "red flags" that pop up. He is in a profession that has chosen to take an oath to be of service to the world, thus on call 24/7. I love to be adored and have lots of attention so that is something I have to consider. I already told him that what he needs is someone who can accept being number 2 in his life, which is so not me, lol, yet he assured me when he was in relationships he altered his work schedule and his mate was #1 and that he doesn't want to lose me. What also works is that I am working on my own life right now and the thought of a boyfriend up close might hinder the time I need to spend on a new career move and personal achievements.

So the way I'm going to handle this is as follows: I am going to continue to bask in the emotional and spiritual connection that nourishes my soul with all of the beautiful things he says to me in our lengthy emails, text messages, and phone conversations. The "energy" from this is adding fuel to my self esteem and I am now going to alter my out-dated need for a "knight in shining armor" to be the first one to get the conversation started. I'm letting go of the fact that my attractiveness intimidates men and I will start making the first move now because my "Romeo" in Mexico can't be the only one who feels this way about me, for love is not this scarce, it is abundant.

Though it can feel like a soul-mate connection, the reality is there is no ring on my finger and I am still single so I don't feel like it's cheating if I "spark it up" with a "local", even if he dominates my thoughts all day. I am being realistic, yet still considering and hopeful. I told him that if our physical chemistry is the same as our online/telephone chemistry when he comes to visit, then that is when I will strongly consider moving to Mexico but that is far in the future, yet our connection thus far has inspired me to look for a better paying job and he has already stated we could take turns flying back and fourth which is more doable seeing as how the flights to Mexico aren't that much and he already offered to help when it comes to me visiting him. One thing he does say is, "Just live in the moment" and I am doing that and not too concerned with worrying about a future that isn't here yet or if he is "the one" when it feels that he is. All that matters is the universe DID answer my call, the person just happens to live in another country and I have to work with that until I learn that 1. This is the guy for me and alter my life in some way to be with him, or 2. Enjoy his company until I meet someone closer who makes me feel the exact same way.

Lastly, if all of you posters are single. I also feel these connections are akin to "emotional affairs" that coupled people have, we're just single being told what we want/need to hear in the absence of someone up close. So be mindful of that as well and take into consideration what I've said about how potential mates who are closer to you might be feeling the same feelings about you but are just as afraid of approaching you as you are them. Would you want to run the risk of spending a lot of money going to another country to be disappointed or do it with someone 3 blocks away? By all means if you have considered all there is to, and your international lover is the one, go for it and if it doesn't work out know that at least you made the effort in the name of love and that you are two steps closer to finding that special someone.

Best wishes to all of you.

Well, I haven't met her yet, but after 41,150 chats between the 2 of us, I really thought she was the one. I am to go visit her in February, 2012. She stole my heart. For the first time in 23 years, I feel the love I have never felt. Just a week before I leave, she tells me that she found somebody that she has interest in. I thought I was going to be with her forever. We chatted so much, basically ran out of things to chat about. I just found out I was being Played. I sometimes wonder what were to happen if I was to visit her sooner?? She says easy to fall, hard to keep. I have all the qualification she is looking for. I do not lie, cheat, steal, or abuse. The hotel I booked is non-refundable. I am still working on the bus ticket. So far I have invested $400 in this trip. I have 8 days as of today to make up my mind. Any input is helpful. I could still go for the sights. But as of now, I just don't know what to do.

I would first do a background check on him to make sure he is who he says he is. he says he is. Many men contact women who are in foreign countries just because they want american citizenship. I think it would have been wise to have done this long before your emotional attachment to him. Ordinarily I would delete men who contact me from foreign countries (for instance facebook) but something told me not too in this situation. I am taling to someone for only for two weeks and of course he seems great. He says he is an american living in another country and travels for business. Maybe, maybe not. I mean who knows? I dont know your age but you must be young to have not checked him out.I would do that with anyone I started dating. It may not be romantic but you dont want to end up as a sex slave. Its a shame but we are not in the 50's I have to remind myself of that all the time. I hope you read this and do the wise and safe thing. I would rather be safe then sorry. Not everyone is who they appear to be. I would have no problem with a person doing a background check on me. I have nothing to hide and in todays day and age anyone who does not do it has a lot to learn. I would provide the person with any information he needed to be safe and if he cares for you he should do that for your piece of mind. There are crazy women out there too. Look at the movies. Good luck.

How comforting it is to see that i am not the only girl here going crazy with someone on net, but i think i had the most confusing case here.
Well, i accidentally met this man in a dating site and at first i am not attracted to him, you know he is from Iran, and thinking of someone from that country seems to be odd and scary(i had to admit) but he chatted me first and i just replied not knowing that one single reply could lead to something else more, we noticed that we like so many things about each other he is educated, nice and charming too. I've become so interested with him and his persian culture, I have learned to love Iran, his language and culture and him so much. we enjoyed chatting with each other for long hours like almost everyday and talking over the phone, he told me he likes me and i like him too.We are so into each other and know each other very well he even told me his good and bad side and how he wants to get married soon and have me as his wife.We chatted for more than a year.
Until we decided to make things real, but that is where the problem arise. Do you know the feeling when you love someone and your heart tells you go, be with him, maybe he is the one while your mind tells you oh be careful, think many times before you meet him, that thinking makes me really crazy.
He decided to come here so we can meet,marry and be with him in Iran, but i said the word no, not yet, i can't tell him i am scared.Then one day he said these things on me, he told me that it is going nowhere, that we should open our eyes and see that it will not work,"he said you are the one who refused me, and now we are 27300km away from each other, i have a good life here im the boss of a medium company,i can't leave everything here, what am i going to do there in your country?just an immigrant?i will be nothing...and told me that it is best to keep things this way online, but for real will not be good for both of us. It is very sad to hear all of these words from him.
i had many questions in mind after that night, did he really loved me?or just played? was it all my fault? did he said all those things because he is not really deeply in love with me because he cannot afford to leave his good life just for me, or he is just being practical? Does loving someone means you have to leave everything behind, sacrifice and take the risks to prove your love?
Online love feels so good like loving someone in person, and hurts like you also loved someone in real.
In addition, I just like to us everyone's opinion about those people who get so deeply in love on net, is there something wrong with us?I hope there's nothing so bad about doing it. Right now i am trying to forget this man and move on.

Here i was thinking i'm the only person in the world in this situation... A few months ago this random guy from Croatia added me on facebook and messaged me. At first i thought he was like some kind of creep but eventually we started to skype and talk more and it got to the point where we talked and skyped every single day... sometimes ALL DAY! it's been 4 months since then and i really like this guy... I am a junior in college and he is 4 years older than me and lives in crotia with his parents. We've made plans to meet each other this christmas ... but i don't know how to tell my mom or my friends... i feel like they will think i'm crazy or something.

well i have had 2 experiences:
1.i went on holiday and on the last day,i met someone,over the next few months we practically lived together via man,the computer was never off as long as we were both able to be online,we showed each other what we ate,we went in the bathroom together ,had sex,slept together, any time we could wake and see the other sleeping.It was intense and felt perfectly normal.when he came over ,he was mean,criticised the smell and size of my house and was lousy in bed.
2.relinked with my first boyfriend after 35 years,it was a hurricane,we replanned our life and i was on a plane within 1 month,we spent a week together,he was a perfect gentleman,but not the man i had been speaking to for one month,on the phone,he was vibrant and outgoing but shy and repressed in reality.I returned home and he didn't even answer the phone for 2 days,after a prompting email,he said he didn't like me,he had to think about it..I told him to forget it.

well i have had 2 experiences:
1.i went on holiday and on the last day,i met someone,over the next few months we practically lived together via man,the computer was never off as long as we were both able to be online,we showed each other what we ate,we went in the bathroom together ,had sex,slept together, any time we could wake and see the other sleeping.It was intense and felt perfectly normal.when he came over ,he was mean,criticised the smell and size of my house and was lousy in bed.
2.relinked with my first boyfriend after 35 years,it was a hurricane,we replanned our life and i was on a plane within 1 month,we spent a week together,he was a perfect gentleman,but not the man i had been speaking to for one month,on the phone,he was vibrant and outgoing but shy and repressed in reality.I returned home and he didn't even answer the phone for 2 days,after a prompting email,he said he didn't like me,he had to think about it..I told him to forget it.

I AM GOING THROUGHT THE SAME THING! But i live in Texas and he lives in Delaware. He is stationed there. (Air Force) He used to live here, we went to the same school so i dont have to worry about all that creepy stuff.
but this was so useful to me. i thank you. i actually thought i was the only one going through this situation.
i guess there are other wierdos like me.
he is everything i ever wanted in a man. hes good to me. hes perfect for me. i just never have the time to go and see him. :/

I AM GOING THROUGHT THE SAME THING! But i live in Texas and he lives in Delaware. He is stationed there. (Air Force) He used to live here, we went to the same school so i dont have to worry about all that creepy stuff.
but this was so useful to me. i thank you. i actually thought i was the only one going through this situation.
i guess there are other wierdos like me.
he is everything i ever wanted in a man. hes good to me. hes perfect for me. i just never have the time to go and see him. :/

Come on! when you find someone really love you, distance means nothing. Best regards.

I am in love with a man who found me through the internet. He and I speak two different languages, and he's had other "internet" romances that didn't positively work out in the end. With me, he says he's trying to avoid the textbook definition of insanity, and that I truly am his soul mate. He says when we speak over the phone (I'm in NYC, He's in Holland) that it feels like I am right there with him.

I've got a great "scuzzball" detector, unfortunately due to dating totally twisted men, mostly from "real life" (isn't this real life?). He passes the bar everywhere. Serendipity makes it easier for us to conceivably one day, be together. He wants to move to NYC (I wanted to move to Holland lol, but sure, he wants to come here for work, he's a male model, why not? He'd fair well here.) anyway, and also, his mother's boyfriend is american, so he is coming here to visit sometime, soon anyway. i'm lucky in this instance of finding someone online. he wants everything i want out of life, he's basically the male version of me. Nothing we can say about the passion- or speed of how fast we fell in love will shock the other. His passion is over-coming his european "stoicism", and that's a good thing. I'm sure he's stoic with most others, but not me. He's so very keen on Skyping, and I'd read through his "tumblr" in posts before where he's stated that he "loathed it and was afraid of it".

This all seems surreal, and yes, he is VERY forthright with saying he thinks we are soul mates & we have had many lives together, as lovers. As long as he makes it one of his priorities that he'll be here, I'm not worried.

Oddly enough, I'm the older one in the relationship. (call me a cougar, whatever, i'm 27)However, european men age and mature much differently than yankee boys. He wants to be a parent, he thinks about these things in a romantic way a typical "american girl" would. I have alot of faith in him, and confidence. I'm actually waiting for him to wake up right now, so I can talk to him. He vocalized that he was afraid that we'd be glues to our computers, and he is wanting and craving me so badly, so much, already, that we'd never leave the keyboards until I make a trip to see him over in Holland.

I can do that-- I've got the time, and I can save enough money to go see him for a time, until things are realized... and I think I can continue little trips, and so can he, until he decides to move here (though in the long run, i'm going to try to convince him that we should go back to holland, it is so much nicer there than here in the usa....).. I guess I'm lucky, the wheel of fortune landed me with someone who's job is to live where i do for their work, and him being a male model, he needs to be in NYC for.

I hope, somehow things work out between us. i hope they do for you, too. European men know how to treat women with classic romance much better than american guys, but that just may be me. their romantic hearts will lead them to act in reality, so all i can say to you, is have faith

Like all of you I am in the same position. I am 20 years old and am living in Australia; he is 23 and lives in New York. We randomly meet on an adult chat site; we managed to have some really great conversations. He asked me for my email after a week, I made a new email address to protect myself, as this was something I had never done before. For the next 5 months we talked every second day, at this point I thought of us as flirty friends. Then he told me he was going in for surgery on his knee, I asked him to make sure he let me know he was okay, that was 3 months ago, and since that day we have talked every day twice a day. We have also skyped 5 times. We share things with each other, photos, thoughts, and (I am embarrassed to admit but) sex-email (like sextexting).
In these recent 3 months, I've really began to fall for him, I cannot help it. He has said once over Skype that he could very easily fall for me. I Don't want to love him. Not yet. The distance and the fact that we have never meet scares me. I have been very badly hurt by my ex; I am terrified to get hurt again. I am more scared of him rejecting me if we were to meet. We are both attractive people, but I feel that he is way out of my league. In my eyes he is perfect, simply amazing, sometimes over skyped we can just sit and stare at one another and be content.
I do deeply care about him, and I think he for me. I have told him out right I am scared he won't like me if he meet me, and I've said that he could very easily find someone else. He keeps saying fate brought us together, and that he is very loyal, but I am sceptical, can I trust his word.
He wants to meet me, and I him. He is hoping to come here for a short holiday, and if things go okay, I am looking at studying in New York (something I had wanted to do since before I meet him).
I cannot help but daydream sometimes about what it would be like to be together. I am hoping that things work out and I don't get my heart broken again. I hope one day I can be one of the few who's relationship works out. I won't love him, until he meets me and really sees me.
Thank you to everyone who has posted their insight into falling for someone who lives somewhere else in the world. My advice to others who read my story is, fall in love whenever you can. Just think how happy you can be, even if it only lasts for a few minutes. And just think, your another person closer to your perfect someone. And just also a quote someone passed on to me not too long ago:
Love- Powerful in small spaces, yet with profound effect on distance. Love defies time, outliving both its source and its object. Love is faster than light; for light requires time in order to travel through space, but love reaches its object instantaneously. Love journeys forever; into infinity.
Good luck all, my heart is with you.

Hey i want to share my story I met someone on the internet in 2009 n we've been tlkn on and off. Through. The .years .we really. Like each other he actually lives in Morocco n I the u.s he's been trying to get a visa to come here but he has to wait I talked to him on Skype for the first time in all 3 yrs I've known him n it was very great but he told me he loved me and I feel the same way but idk wat to do we can't really b together bcus he is a muslim n I a Christian he has to marry a Muslim n he wants me to convert but idk if I want to I believe n my religion but I luv him but I'm scared to c him wat if he's not what I expected or worst wat if. Hes amazing. Then he leave ill b crushed I'm scared either way bcus ik ill get hurt... I need advice plez

I understand, it seems like a lot of people on this post have one thing or another that keeps them apart besides distance. a lot of sacrifices would have to be made. only you can really decide if the risks are worth it. love can be very painful.

I need some advice please. I met a guy more than a year ago. He was in the town that I work for business. We met; i had to leave the following morning on a business trip. During my trip we text each other all day. When I came back we spent all our free time together. It was simply amazing. I think he is gorgeous. I actually approached him the night we met...

Anyway, he left to go back to the US. (I am in the Middle-East, but I am not from here. I am from another continent.)

We stayed in touch and a few months later he came back. It was so amazing. He was here for my birthday, met all my friends (even my mom). It was so perfect. Then he left again after 2 weeks.

We haven't seen each other since but we have stayed in touch. I go to the US on business and on both occasions he didn't come to see me. The first time I understood. He had to have surgery on his shoulder. The second time... not so much. I was very disappointed that he didn't make the effort to come and see me. He said he had to work - even on the weekend.

So I left the US and then I just started losing interest. But I think of him all the time. I was just so disappointed that he didn't come to see me. But I kept a brave face and told him "I dont care"...

We stay in touch via email all the time, until 2 weeks ago when I told him "I can't do this anymore, I will stop communicating." He said "Okay."

Now, the truth is I have feelings for him. For about a year now. But I have not told him. I dont know what to do ... I have this email in my drafts, spilling it all... but I have not sent it.

Should I send it?

I am in the same boat. I feel stupid, crazy, hopeless. For all of the same reasons. I met someone from Germany, just playing a dumb internet game. I have fallen so in love. I wasn't looking for love, I just felt it almost instantly. And I do what real love is. But he lives so far away. It is killing me. I can't tell anyone because they would say I was not in love, and am just being silly. There are plenty of men around here I could date, but want him and he wants me. But we can't leave our lives and families. I don't know what to do.

I think that a lot of us are unhappy because we have been programmed to live our lives a certain way. We are bound by rules that society has created for us. We often forget that we have the power to live by our own rules. I felt silly for the past few days because I could not wrap my head around the fact that I am falling for someone in another country. Now that I see that I am not the only one, I feel so much better. I think that you should take a look around you and ask yourself are you truly happy?

I asked myself this question a year and a half ago and I packed up and moved to New York. It was the scariest thing that I have ever done. I left my job, family and friends to pursue my dreams and it was the best decision I ever made. I have a great job, new friends and everyday I discover something new in my city. Even though I worry a little about what people might think of my internet love affair, I am more worried what would happen if I don't at least try.

Just when I thought I was completely out of my mind, I find this forum. I recently connected with a guy in India. I never in a million years thought that I could fall for someone via Skype! Not only is he gorgeous but he is smart and very down to earth. He come from a very traditional family but, he has his own mind and his own views. He is currently trying to find a University here in New York so that he can get his Masters and be close to me. I would never move to India, but he is very open to moving to the U.S. I literally feel sad when I can not talk to him. There is a 10 hour time difference but we have found a happy medium.

I love the way he talks to me. We spend a lot of time learning about each other and it is so refreshing. We are very attracted to one another and he makes my heart race when he smiles at me. I have dated some losers in my day so, I am completely open to have extraordinary experiences. I believe that if this is my soul mate, I am up for the challenge and the adventure.