Medical Questions > Relationships > Dating Forum

Evaluate my "date," please?

I'm posting here because I'm truly at the point where I can't tell if someone likes me or not. I thought that I had experience by now... but every time I meet a new girl, it's always different, and I always get nervous and read into things too much.

Anyway, we're both in our 20s, and I'm a few years older than her. I met this girl off of Craigslist, and we talked via email and IM for quite a bit. We were able to hold an actual conversation for quite awhile. This one part come up when I had talked about a (fast food) restaurant that opened up nearby that normally isn't where I live, but is near her place. We both love the place, and I asked her if she'd like to hang out sometime to go there, meet, or get some ice cream. She said she would love to, but had plans today. (With someone else she met on CL.) However, she ended up hanging with me anyway, because I was able to hold a decent and long conversation with her.

I drove up to see her after she hung out with the other guy. And she said "The guy was sweet" when I asked if he was anything like she expected. (We had suspected he might be shady at first.) She said they had a good time walking around town, and that they were going to hang out again 2 days later for something.

We went and got our food, went back to her apartment, and pretty much just talked the whole night. She says she likes hanging out with me and would like to again sometime. (Saying things like we could get ice cream, do something else, etc.) However, she wouldn't make any definite plans with me again on the same day. (Yet has plans with the other guy she met first.)

Anyway, we were able to hold a conversation for a couple hours without any awkward silences, and stuff. She claims she's a blunt person that if she didn't want to hang again, she'd be blunt about it. (However, that hasn't stopped people before from doing it.)

We have a lot of things in common, and we're able to hold a conversation. Now, today wasn't exactly a date I guess, but I really like this person and I don't know if she wants to hang out again, or not.

When I was leaving, it was odd because I didn't know how she'd say goodnight. She ended up hugging me.

I don't know how to read this. I mean, I know a lot of female friends who give out guys to guys... but I'm not sure in this particular instance.

Am I reading too much into it? Do you think she doesn't like me because she made definite plans with someone else, but not me? (Yet, anyway.)

I mean, she just claims she's trying to see what's out there, and stuff... But I REALLY like this girl, and I think we click rather well. It's just that in these situations, it's always a mystery to me. Especially when I apparently have competition.

It was our first time meeting, so we didn't exactly sit close to each other, or flirt really, so I didn't try anything, kiss her, etc. Do you think she just wants to be friends, or what?

Mainly I'm concerned with:

-She says she wants to hang out again, but won't make any plans. (But did with the other guy.)
-She hugged me. Which, a lot of girls do, but I don't know if that means anything or not. (She could have very well not hugged me, or shook my hand, or something.)

Also, maybe it was just to be comfortable, but she didn't sit on the same couch as me. I mean, it's easier to talk that way so you see each other face to face, but I would think if she had any interest in me, she wouldn't mind getting close?

Yes, I read into this stuff a lot. I was in a relationship for a year, and recently broke up, so dating is scary and foreign to me.

I need some... girly... advice. Thanks!
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replied November 24th, 2011
I would take this one pretty slow if I was you...She's undecided....send her flowers...and a nice card saying you enjoyed being with her...nothing else...

She will start taking you more seriously or she'll bolt...either way you'll know.
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replied November 24th, 2011
I am a girl, in my late 20s...

It seems to me that she sees you as a friend, a special friend. It's recent, so there is time to show her that you would like to have something else. My advice is: go out with someone else. Hang out with other girls and let her know. It will be good for you because you won't be too focussed on her and she will also notice that she might lose you.

Hugging you means that she feels comfortable around you... She likes you, it is clear... but perhaps does not want to "spoil the friendship". She makes plans with the other guy because she might be more interested in him as a potential boyfriend, but feels attracted to the comforting feelings she gets when around you (good on you!). But, seriously, hang out with other girls! Wait and then do what asby36 said =)
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