Medical Questions > Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum

Does he still love me & will he come back?

Hi there this is my first time posting here. Well here is my story. Me and my ex were together for 4 years. Last year December he asked me marry him and we were discussing moving in together all that stuff. I was so happy. This year he started a new job met new people and the girls at work just loved him. He is a very atrractive guy and well i'm concidered as not attractive and pretty at all. So you can imagine all the nasty things people are saying to him about me. Telling him i'm 2 fat & to ugly 4 him, all those stuff. This really made me insecure about his love 4 me, even though he proved over and over how much he loved me. He never cheated he did everything 4 me. He was my best friend. We could talk about anything. I was myself with him all the time.For 4 years all the nasty comments never bothered him but ever since he started working at his new job i think it did because he changed completely. Throughout the 4 years he never really had a stable job and i bought him clothes ang gave him everything he asked. But we had some pretty tough times and nasty fights. My insecurities always got in the way, and i'm only realising that now. We said very hurtful things 2 each other through the years, he told me that i'm ugly and no other guy wants me, and if it wasn't 4 him no other guys will look at me that short of stuff. I told him that i made him. I was possesive. He was a drugg addict when we met and i helped him get off the drugg completely. He left the druggs 4 me. He had no confidence, no nice clothes he looked really bad. Now that he's got everything thanks 2 me he leaves me 4 another girl at work.And he told me beacuse of this he left. Because i always reminded him that i got him to where he is.

But the thing is this. we still talk alot. He aksed me 2 forgive him andto take him back 2 times already, but then the next day when i call him he says he changed his mind and that he is staying with his new girlfriend. This is hurting me so much. Everytime we talk he keeps on telling me how much he loves me and how much his heart wants to be with me, but he says he has to proove to people that he can make it on his own and that he doesn't need me to support him anymore. He cries with me saying over and over how much he loves me and wants to be with me. Yesterday he asked me if we can be friends, cause he doesn't want to loose touch with me. I' am trying so hard to move on with my life cause i know he has someone else but how can i if this keeps happening. I love him so much. Why doesn't he just come back to me. Do you think he really still loves and that he will come back. It feels like i'm going crazy. Please help. I made a mistake but i will do anything 2 have him in my arms again.
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replied April 22nd, 2009
Community Volunteer
Forget about him...When you first met him he was into drugs...Even then he was not that nice of a person...Now that he has cleaned up, he is even worse...He will hurt you...You really don't need this...As for your question of does he still love you, the answer is NO...He probably never did...He only knows self love...He is a taker and not a giver...Move on honey, and make your life...

I send you all my best wishes for a wonderful life...

Caroline
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replied April 27th, 2009
Extremely eHealthy
i agree with Caroline. Let him have his space so he can prove to the world. That matters more to him than the love he claims to have for you, in time things could work out. But dont let yourself relive the pain of losing him anymore. There is a man out there meant for you who will love you no matter what! And a man that doesnt need a woman to bring them anywhere. You deserve much better and dont settle for less than you are wiling to give. You have given A LOT in this relationship and should receive the same. Even if hes having a crisis he is still with someone else.

Lots of love girl...i too know what you are going through.
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replied April 27th, 2009
Experienced User
you should just give him his space. if you keep talking to him, he might just keep getting more confused. if you love something, you let it go, if it comes back, then it was meant to be. i think he needs to decide what he wants. maybe give him a little time and after that time see if you guys can start fresh. dont tell him you got him to where he is now, just accept his past and your past and start new. he sounds like he loves you, just needs some time to himself.
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replied April 27th, 2009
supporter
Hey lemme tell you something..if he truely
loves you he would leave her to be with you..
but he says he changes his mind..i was in
your situation before...my exboyfriend use
to always call me and we still talked and
stuff and he'd always say that he loves me even
though hes with another women..it made me sad..
i'd always cry and everything...when i get jealous..he
would call me a !**@! and everything...
And if you do evrything for him and do whatever
he wants...what you get in return is nothing..
They leave you in the end...they think that
you still love them and care about them so
they pretend to say sweet things to you and
all...i was like you i'd always say i want to
move on..but i couldnt...i told myself i havce
to win him back all the time...and it took me
about 2 years to get over him..but now im over
him...i left him for good...but in the end
he tried to come back...and i realized what he
did to me..the bad things he said and all those
times he had cheated on me...so then i careless now..and
when i was with my new man..he came up to confront my man saying that
"if you hurt her i will beat you up" and my man which is now my husband said that dont worry i wont do her harm like what you did in the past...
And so im happily married to my husband and have a beautiful daughter
together..i dont regret nothing im happy where i am at...ill leave the past behind and
think of it as a memory or somehting that i have learned...
well if i were you i'd leave him and never contact with him
anymore..no matter how much he calls or wants to
see or talk to you...
you should just tell him its really over..
and find a guy who is really worth your tears!
Goodluck!
and take kare.
toodles!
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replied May 2nd, 2009
Supporter
he's STAYING with his girl, but he want to prove to people he can be independent w/o you.
that doesn't sound like independence to me.
he probably doesn't feel like a man b/c you did so much for him and you throw it in his face a lot.
He's playing game!!!!!
he wants to be with his current girlfriend, and if that ends he wants to keep you on the side b/c he knows your a good women.

i was the good women my ex wanted to break up with, play around, and then come back to me b/c i was the better women. that caused me so much pain.

don't allow him to string you alone while he has someone else. he made up his mind who he wants to be with. He probably have strong feelings for you. i suggest you move on like he has.
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replied May 2nd, 2009
Supporter
Forget about him............
Life is too short to worry about loosers...in this case its his loss. Move on and find yourself a good man!
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replied May 2nd, 2009
Active User, very eHealthy
First, stop torturing yourself by taking his calls. Let the machine pick up. Make yourself scarce to him. My guess is he still needs you for a crutch in case he screws up. He has alot of people messing with his mind, telling him things, and he is stupid enough to listen to them. Let the other woman have the headache for the time being. Talking to him just makes you feel worse. I'd be willing to bet when he can't get ahold of you he is going to freak out. Too bad! You need to get some self- respect! Tell yourself you ARE a good person, you are NOT too fat, or ugly! Put your time into making yourself the best you can be FOR YOU, and it will draw other people to you. There are lots of wonderful men out there looking for a good woman! Be there waiting when one comes calling! Good luck hon!
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replied December 14th, 2009
will i get him back, does he love me after split up
Hi. Even am going through same faces of life.
I was in relation with a guy for past 2 years and got engaged. our relation was very healthy and rocking in initial. i did so much for him, treated him like my child, got him new branded clothes, helped in financially to clear his emi's but later he got new job and started working for night shifts, he started to meet new people and girls. slowly he started to avoid me. after an year when i asked him to marry he said he dont love me, it was just crush and am not so beautiful as he expect his wife to be. but i love him so much. i really cant stay without him. i attempted to end my life. i did everything to save my relation with him but his family also supported him saying he is a guy and mistake happens but being a girl you need to be careful. we brokeup. i still loved him, i kept calling his number and sent emails but no reply. after being breakup of 5 months, i met him last week. he was very happy and comfortable talking to me but he finally said he dont love me at all. how do i get him back. again he changed his number. does he really love me. will i get my love back please reply
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replied December 15th, 2009
God always choose a wrong person for us, I really don't understand, why we should be in love with a person who never loves us in return, I went through similar kind of situation,
I loved a person in depth without analyzing he would cheat me. I did so much for him, I avoided my family and friends for him. I compromised on all circumstances and situation though it wasn't my mistake just to feel him happy that he is a king and i obey him. but he was so much stone hearted guy that i ever met in my life he took my unconditional love as advantage. He started to find a other girl and finally without a courtesy he ditched me. I still love him so much but i know that he don't love me at all as he used to feel earlier. today we both are strangers.
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replied December 15th, 2009
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shalinimanu wrote:
God always choose a wrong person for us, I really don't understand,


I believe that God can allow things to happen to correct us, or for us to see something that is important.

But i really believe it's the other way around, we put ourselves in bad situations, and cry to God for him to help us out of it.

The five year relationship i was in, if i ignored how much i loved him, i would have never ignored the many red flags he sent me. love is powerful, and we are emotional beings.
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replied December 15th, 2009
Community Volunteer
Honey, don't be bitter...Only remember the good times that you had with him and hold them dear...Sometimes in life, some of us only are chosen to get just a taste of happiness...Just a bit piece that we can hold onto for the rest of our life...Think of it this way, you have known love...This alone should warm your heart the rest of your life....

Be happy for him...He felt in his heart that it would not work, so he told you...He didn't want to hurt you, but he did it for both of your good....Don't be bitter...Smile and think back on all the good times that you have had and keep this a sweet memory of the past....Be happy for all the love that you have known....I send you my best wishes....

Caroline
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replied March 23rd, 2010
I really feel sorry now for many people who have the same experience. I ve been through the same. Had a lovely boyfriend who would do anything for me and now all of it its gone cuz he is not ready and most likely he does not love me anymore. It is really difficult for me cuz i still love him.. n its been three weeks that im trying not to text him, i still did not.. but there are moments when im really tempted. I have to let go i know, but it is not easy.. I just do not get one thing, how come one day he was so into me, spent time with me.. n after that he just changed n stayed cold n prefered to spend his time with his friends. N as i remember, im still the same... what i feel one day, i feel it next day. I do not understand men, n now i want to stay single.. for good... they just piss me off
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replied February 1st, 2012
is the best speel caster thank you
jenny
I recently saw a testimony about a spell caster of some sort in a blog I visit for relationship and dating counseling problems because i had been having serious issues with my boyfriend and we had been dating for six months,he just suddenly changed,he was returning my calls,he started cheating,he was hurting me in so many ways i never thought possible and I just thought I should try it*maybe out of desperation of some sort ..and I contacted them..At first everything felt dreamy and unbelievable,their consultations and solution was a little bit easy and strange and I was scared a little cos I heard read and heard lots of stories of fake spell casters,scams and i never really believed in magic..I played along with a little hope and and faith and I was sent some few stuffs after everything and it worked like a miracle,everything went to a while new direction,it was and is amazingI guess it was all good faith that made me read That particular post that faithful day..I hope they could help other people too like they did meI did a little and I got everything I
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replied March 22nd, 2012
leave him. Don't be hurt by him again. Find another person who really love you.
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