I had an active eating disorder (purging) for about three years, but was finally able to mostly control my behavior. About a year and a half after I stopped purging, I met a guy, and we have been in a steady relationship for about two years. I've never told him about my eating disorder, and it makes me feel like I'm hiding something. I would really like him to know about this part of my past. However, I'm worried that if I tell him, it will throw our relationship off balance and he'll feel like he has to stay with me to help me be stable. I don't want him reading into comments I make and worrying that I'm sneaking around purging-- at this point, I've learned on my own how to control my behavior. Also, I'm worried that he will be upset that I waited so long to tell him. Do I tell him? Have you told partners about your eating disorders?
My my experience in telling my boyfriend I felt like I had to tell him before things got too serious between us. I didn't want him to feel like I lied or tricked him if he ended up liking me and my ED was a deal breaker for him. For me it was different because I met him in the middle of my treatment program. I told him but was able to say I was working on it and that he did not need to treat me different, if i wanted help I would let him know. I was lucky, he didnt judge me and telling him made our relationship stronger. If he did judge, I dont think I would want to be in a relationship with someone like that. As for your situation everyone is different. You are not actively engaging in your ED and it is now something of the past. I guess you need to weigh the pros and cons of telling your boyfriend. Good luck!