Well, where to start...
Im 18, in my second year of college. Im studying 3 subjects officially, and due to a major mistake by the college last year, im doing a 2 year assignment based course over 4 months.
A few months back a friend notices that i wasnt my usual self, and said i might have depression. I didnt think much of it at the time, just thought its the usual stress of everyday life.
More recently, two of my lecturers at college have spoken to me in private and asked whether theres anything i need help with. They have said i seem to be losing interest, and is there anything on my mind that may be causing it.
I have noticed this myself, since around september, when my second year of college started and i changed part time jobs. I have difficulty getting to sleep, and staying asleep. Its not uncommon for me to wake up sometimes 3 or even 4 times a night. I feel tired both in my head and in my body - i can somehow feel my tiredness in my chest, which is hard to explain what i mean.
My concentration (mainly at college) has dropped right down, and i find myself using all my energy just trying to keep awake.
Also, this extra course is putting more pressure on me, because it wasnt sorted out until january, and all 6 units (8 assignments per unit) need to be in by the end of april.
Because of this and my other course thats all coursework, i have no time to go over and revise my normal courses (physics and business accounts), which is causing problems, mainly in physics.
On top of all this, my car which iv had since december, which was meant to help me save time (over an hour bus journet to college), has turned out to be a disaster with it going back to the garage every few weeks for new parts. Thankfully they dont charge me for these. My fuel is costing around £100 per month, plus insurance brings it to just over £200. I pay £60 keep a month, and get to keep about £120 of my wages for whatever, i usually save as much as possible.
Another thing is my mum has just been diagnosed with cancer, so i have to help out even more around the house, and am relyed upon to take my brother to nursery and back sometimes. Also soon she will have to travel over 100 miles per day for treatment, so im going to be making sure my brother and sister are ok, have meals etc.
Theres also issues at work where i cant ask for time off, because the manager has been fired, plus a bunch of other people have quit, so theres no-one to ask who can authorise time off.
Finally, i have found out that i have RSI in my right wrist, and slightly in my left. I use the computer a lot for college work, and try to avoid it in my free time. But then i play bass guitar which doesnt help. But playing music helps me to relax, and i cant give it up.
Iv been told i should go to see a doctor, i mentioned a few problems when i went and found out about the RSI, but they didnt seem to care and just said get more sleep and youll be fine. I would do, but i try to go at half ten (working right up until then), but dont get a decent nights sleep.
All of these things i have mentioned run through my mind whenever im trying to relax or sleep, and it gets to me so much i want to cry, but i cant. Im sure if i did cry for a while id feel a lot better.
So, do i just need to get more sleep, possibly by using sleeping tablets, or is it something like depression as i have been told?
I would love to also get a bit healthier by joining a gym, but at the moment i have no time for that. Im currently trying to eat healthier than i used to, such as eating fruit rather than biscuits between meals.
Thankyou very much for taking the time to read this, and any advice will be greatly appreciated. Im willing to try anything at the moment to feel better.
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