I'm new here.
And I'm so scared to even post this. I was shown this link by a friend, who has become concerned. My depression is worse. I've never been diagnosed by a professional, but my childhood doctor started to suspect when I was around...12 or so.
I've been SI-ing, and have developed an eating disorder, all through my "depression". I cannot afford to get professional help, and my friends are telling me to get over it. Last summer, before I moved to college, I tried to explain to my mother that I was depressed that I needed help. I showed her my scars, my open wounds. She slapped me and told me that "there is no such thing as depression, stop being a drama queen"
Now I'm scared to ask for help. But this is starting to kill me. I'm engaged and my fiance doesn't know how to help me. I'm ruining us and our future, all because of this disease...college life is not enjoyable, because I'm not with the people I'm normally "normal" with.
The stress...I just found out my grandmother has leukemia, my family changed the locks on my house, told me not to come home, school itself is stressful...I just am at my last end right now. I'm fighting this so hard, but I'm failing at it badly.
Please...I don't know how this forum works..but any advice is welcome.
I'm sorry if this is all wrong and I'm taking up space.