Depression During Pregnancy Forum - depressed and married

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Q: depressed and married

asked by: LostInEverything on August 25th, 2009

New User

I am about 7weeks. My husband and i just got married in April. we didnt know each other long. he is military. I love him to death. I just dont feel lke im good enough for him anymore, or never was. He gets mad about everything lately. House isnt clean enough. all he ever eats is sandwiches now. I sleep all day, on computer all day. No job. well heres my symptoms

dont feel like eating anything
always feel yucky. kinda like mono? tired all the time. sleep for most the day.
BAD dreams. not a single good one anymore. every night its a bad one
always tired even if i slept 10-12 hours.
feeling worthless

I am constantly crying myself to sleep, or him to sleep. Im scared to say anything at my appointment on the 31st of this month because he will probaly get pissed off. im hurting hiiiss baby or something.

he is always talking about me being with some other man. or him n how he shouldnt have marriedd me, should have ended it sooner. talking about how he will just have to pay child support. i dont know what to do anymore.

we are also moveing to NY in the next month or so.

help anyone? please

Replies(2)

ServiceU

replied on August 25th, 2009

Supporter

your showing symptoms of depression. your husband is mentally and emotionally abusive towards you. sometimes when a person isnt happy with themselves they put their spouses down, and it only gets worse if it's not addressed.
my ex put me though five years of it and he has done a number on me mentally. it's been two years and im still healing.
mental abuse can escalate to physical abuse. you cant live your life walking on eggshells with your husband. my ex talked to me the same way and he acted like he didnt care if i left, and when i did leave him he cried for me to come back. his father was abusive to his mother, so it picked up on that.
if he doesnt change there will be a day that your going to get fed up over it. do you have a place you can stay if you leave him? if he is in the military how often is he with you/ away?

ilovelucy72

replied on September 18th, 2009

New User

Yes your symptoms do seem to point to depression. I have major depression and my husband and I have had to work alot of things out. Your husband may be feeling like the situation is out of his control. Most men want to fix things and when they cant they get frustrated. I am not say that he has any excuse to say those horrible things to you though. You might want to talk to your doctor about your symptoms because they might get worse and affect your ability to properly care for yourself. Your husband might not know that much about depression and the symptoms. Thats what my husband didnt understand. He did not know that depression could cause you to lose all sense of hope and not want to get up out of bed. He thought at first I was just lazy. Now after talking with my doctor he understands more and is very supportive. I hope this is the case with your husband. The fist year of marriage can be pretty tough since you are getting to know each other. God bless.

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