I totally get what you are saying...it is amazing how people can be so crass and so...whats the word??? unenlightened maybe? I dont know..it still amazes me also. Why do some straight people even care one way or the other. I don't. If your straight, great. If your gay, great. If your bi, great. If your trans,great. as long as your happy who gives a sh**?? Not me. And I take offense when people get there jollies by spreading rumors or even facts in a illicit way. I say bravo to you for calling her out on that!BRAVO!!
I think people who do things like that have some deep seeded issues. Or maybe not, maybe there just vapid ignorant intolerant gossip mungers.
Thanks for the post, Jules. Food for thought and maybe you can help enlighten her and others..

Hey Jules!
I love your attitude!

I don't even think it has to do with who you have sex with. So many people see gay people as threatening because they equate homosexuality with so many other things that don't make sense IE: Pedophilia, Bestiality, Sexually Transmitted Diseases, in some cases possessing an agenda that threatens the entire world.... the list could go on and on. Some people, without realising it, have a positive attidude about homosexuality, but the residue left over from the many people who make these unfair equations about homosexuality still influence them. It's slowly changing, but it's still a reality.

I can't wait for the day when someone says, for example, about their boss: "He has an awesome Husband" just as someone would say "He has an awesome wife" without any connotation, weirdness, innuendos or references. Wouldn't that be great?!?!

I fully hear you, and sadly enough, with the way the world is, I doubt we will ever see that.

I can understand some suprise about hearing about others being gay - a close friend of mine had to move into an assisted living / retirement community with a population that is catholic... and he's gay.

Recently, he heard about several people that work there that are gay, as well as a couple of the residents there that are either gay or gay friendly. This was a suprise, as well as relief for him... he now feels alot better about being there.

For my current situation, I live in an apartment complex / subsidized housing community, and have no clue as to what the "gayborhood" is all about here... and quite frankly, it won't faze me in the slightest, because I don't care.

Whenever I hear about someone being gay or whatever, I go "great, so what else is new?" (kinda like, I really don't care-type attitude). It's great to have a circle of friends that are gay - but quite honeslty, I am not bent up on my friends' sexual preferences. Gay, Lesbian, Bi, Trans, Asexual, just as long as that person can be themself... thats what matters most.

This is so true! We were visiting my in-laws last weekend and they were talking about this friend of the family they used to have when my DH was a child and about how camp he was and he was a real flirt with the men. Then they turned to my DH and asked, in all seriousness, "He never touched you or anything did he?"

good example of the ignorance...and its a fact that straight men are far more likely to be pedophiles than gay men...I can show stats to back that up.

There are ignorant people everywhere, it doesn't only have to do with referring to homosexuality.
Race, ethnicity, income bracket, children out of wedlock, there are ignorant people that make public opinions about everything.
Chalk it up to the way they were raised.

As for gay people, I agree with all of you--who really cares??!!
At my work, there are a couple of gay men around and the gossip wagon doesn't follow them-only when speculating if females are gay (weird double standard).
I guess maybe because it's the women gossiping? I have no clue.

Straight men ARE more likely to be pedophiles, speaking from personal experience.
My sister was victimized by my uncle-who is married. It happened from a very early age-my uncle was barely 20, my sister was 2!
We like to print his mugshot and sex registry info and mail flyers to all of his neighbors about every few months or so.

Marianne0558, good for you..I have no pity for a child molester at all. Never ever. They ruin kids for life so if they get busted and all the neighbors pass fliers and tell everyone then thats a good thing. You have that responsibility to protect the kids in the neighborhood. Good for you!

Thank you! Your words are always so supportive and kind!!!

Actually, my sister is doing quite well for herself these days!! I have to take a minute to brag... she just graduated as valedictorian of her law school! I am so proud!!!!
She does remember bits and pieces, sadly, but she took that anger and resentment and put it to good use.
She wants to become a judge to put men like this behind bars for good!

Good for you! My step-grandfather molested me from a very early age until I was about ten and it still impacts on my life today. If he was still alive I'd love to 'have words' with him; unfortunately he was cremated so I can't even dance on his grave

Good thing for him he was cremated.
I want to start a mob to go spitting on pedophiles' graves.
I think it should be mandatory to have pedophiles' tombstones read that they were pedophiles. Then people can hate them in their deaths too. May he never rest in peace!

That is awesome! She sounds like a very special and wonderful sister...lucky...you are both lucky to have each other...congrads.

That is AWESOME!

I hate to steal homerx's thunder, but I have to quote him - "We need good people like her in this world!"

Anyone who molests children, in my opinion, should be locked away, and let the lifers there deal with them. I went to a high school and had a faculty advisor for all four years in the radio/TV station I worked in, who was a pedo. He was recently arrested (by my old roommate - who is a police officer in the town we grew up in / went to high school in) and died of a heart attack the night before his arraignment. Good for him, he deserves to die. 40 years, noone said a word. Makes me SOOOOOOO glad I graduated from Maynard High School :rolleyes:

You are amazing with your since of hummer...I bet it has saved you from a lot of heartache. I am so sorry to hear you were molested as a child ...If he was berried I would go with you to do a jig!!!!

Wow. I can go on forever about sicko pedophiles!

They are arrested EVERY day!

There are teachers that I grew up with (one in particular was a good friend's father) that get arrested YEARS after the incidents. Is it really that scary to come forward?
Maybe because I'm very outspoken, if it were me, I would be telling my daddy on that perv as soon as it happened!

SOBs

And why is it that the women teachers don't get as much negativity surrounding them when they are caught sleeping with their students?? It's the SAME THING!

I have a daughter and let me tell you, if ANYONE does anything inappropriate to her without her consent, I will be in jail. I already have it in my will that she is to go to my mother if something like this (God forbid) were to happen. I will be in jail for LIFE!

I guess the child molester thing is an epidemic. And,J...steal my thunder any day...your tops in my book, you know that!

I hear you!

If I were molested in high school, chances are, I would have been arrested for assault / battery once I was done with that teacher. No matter what, that stuff is just outright wrong. When I was questioned, I would be sure to out the guy that touched me. He would fry by the time I'm done.

yeah, If I had kids and that happened to one of them there would be no stopping me...

Well, it's a funny thing but my grandfather never threatened me to keep quiet, it was as if what he was doing was completely normal. I had no idea that it wasn't what all grandfathers did with their grandchildren. The one thing I can't get my head around though is that he was doing it to my cousin too and when he told my Auntie that 'Grandad was touching him' I was asked if he'd done the same to me. I said No! I have no idea why! I still ponder over that today.

Anyway, it stopped after that and when I asked him later why he did it he said, "Because you liked it".

He died when I was eleven and I was devastated; I adored my grandad and thought he was the bees knees. It was only when I was fifteen years old that it suddenly dawned on me, randomly one day on the bus from school, that he had been a paedophile. The mind of a child is such an innocent thing.

Anyway, to this day I can't bear to be kissed. He used to kiss me with his tongue and now that makes me feel physically sick. Even 'normal' kissing is hard for me, I hate the close contact. I also hate being touched 'down below' - it makes my sex life pretty difficult to be honest but I have a wonderful understanding husband who never pushes me.

If I could go the rest of my life without having sex I would be a very happy lady; that's sad because it's because of a selfish man with a sick mind and no self control that I'm like that.

For a long time I was frightened that I would turn into an abuser myself. When I had my son I was scared to touch his privates (nappy changes for example) because I thought it was abusing him. I'm still a bit funny about how I touch him today but I'm getting better because I know I have no sexual intentions towards him, I'm just a mummy doing what a mummy has to do lol!

Wow, I'm sorry I just went off on one there! It's a subject close to my heart and I guess it's all just under the surface really. I can get very angry about it.

It's difficult...

My first b/f was sexually abused by his mother, and there were times when he was home sick from school that he was most vulnerable for that. She died when he was a kid, however, those memories linger with him.

It made things difficult between us as well, and with the health issues and whatnot, was part of the many reasons to forego the relationship and just be friends. It's sad, really. Because of that, he barely lets anyone into what he's thinking, and when that's exposed, you almost want to be on suicide watch for him

Fortunately, whenever I notice him being in a negative mood, I always try to make myself available to talk to him, as I hate seeing him like that. We had some very deep discussions, most of which stays between us, and we both have that trust in each other. He has been doing better lately, especially with the changes that went on around him in the past year. Because he's the one that inspired me to come to the school I'm at now, I want him to be there for my graduation.