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dealing with bipolar girlfriend's aggression

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mindatrisk

New User, Becoming EHEALTHy
Joined: 18 Mar 2008
Posts: 1
dealing with bipolar girlfriend's aggression
Posted: 03-18-08 12:11pm

We have been together for nine months, and for most of that time i have been something of a 'light' in her life, but over the last two weeks things have changed and now i am on the end of her aggression, and i am the target of her hurt.
I know she loves me alot, and i know she has extremely low self worth, and she admits that at times she tries to sabotage our relationship because she doesn't feel like she deserves me and because she is scared that i might leave her one day anyway.
I could really do with some advice or to be able to talk with someone who understands better than i do about what she is experiencing and how i can best serve her. I love her and i am determined to stick by her regardless of what she throws at me, but i need to know what i can do that will be best for her.
Thank you.
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CarolDiane

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Joined: 23 Sep 2007
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Posted: 03-18-08 18:43pm

You have already answered you own question. "Regardless of what she throws at me". That is the key to a BP relationship. Stand by her during her bad cycles and just be there for her. The more you are there, the less she will think you will leave her and become more confident about the relationship.

Hang in there. If you love her as much as you say you do, it will all work out. Us BP people tend to do stupid and errational things sometimes.

Carrie
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antigone

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Joined: 27 Jan 2008
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Posted: 03-18-08 23:03pm

Unfortunately, the people that are the most trusted and loved are the targets of the anger, rage, and uncertainty that accompanies bipolar disorder in someone. The plus side is that it shows how much she trusts you and loves you. This seems to be opposite to what one would think but people that suffer with bpd need to vent. When they vent they want to be safe with who they go off on. My kids give me all the rage and anger. I am the one they feel safe to vent with. I know that is not quite the same but I have read this to be true in many situations.

Get some counseling to have a place to bounce feelings and ideas around. Get a new perspective on the situation and some advice on coping.
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