Well I have this guy in my life who I love more than he'll ever realize. He loves me too and things were going great, but then things started to go wrong and me being the non affectionate type of person caused a lot of problems with us,not intentionally. We ended up splitting up, even though I know that's not what we both wanted, it just felt like the right thing to do at that moment in time. Today we got into a huge fight and I hopped in my car and took off, he followed me in his car. He went too fast down a hill and his brakes failed and he ended up losing control and crashed his car. They airlifted him to another town and he's in critical condition. They put him into an induced coma and now I'm scared that he won't make it. The last thing we did was fight and I feel horrible. If I hadn't taken off, he wouldn't have followed me and he'd be fine right now.

How do I deal with all this? I'm usually not the emotional type and my friend told me that tonight was the first time he had ever seen me cry in the 15 years that we've known each other. The doctors wouldn't even let me see him seeing as the crash was resulted from our argument. I miss him a lot and I just want to see him and tell him that I love him, but I feel like I'll never get the chance to talk to him again. And when he does come out of the coma, what if he doesn't want to see me? I know I'll have to respect his wishes, I love him so much that if he doesn't want to ever talk to me again I'll be heartbroken but if it keeps him safe then I will respect that.

What do I do? How do people deal with the loss of a loved one? Because I feel like it doesn't matter what happens,either way I am going to lose him.