I guess the best thing to do is list some of the things I've been dealling with:
-This doesn't happen everynight. Once every two months at the absolute minimum. I'll be laying in bed, and an instant before I'm drifing off I'll hear, clear as a bell, a woman's voice calling my name, repeating herself with urgency to get my attention. She says other things, which I either can't recollect or couldn't understand.
*Note* I was awake the entire time this happened.^^^^
-I have terrible insomnia,and when I do go to sleep, I run the risk of having another screwed up dream. They don't come all the time, one dream in particular stood out to me. In the dream: I was sitting on a sofa, deep in conversation. There was noone around me, and I knew it, but it didn't seem to bother me. After I got done speaking, I paused, and I realized I had spent 10 minutes deep in a two sided conversation including only me. I sat there with a sinking horror, unable to deny what had happened.
-I have an awful time remembering things. My thoughts are often scrambled,making me pause in the middle of a sentence or conversation to regain my train of thoughts. I often digress rambling about something completely unrelated to the subject at hand
-There have been times, for no apparent reason, that I've seen the opportunity for suicide and considered it. More than once have I stood in front of an electrical outlet, holding a metal wire and deciding whether I should plug it in with the same nonchalance of a person ordering fast food.
-I had a dream about six months after my mom committed suicide. My mom was laying lazily in the front passenger seat of the vehicle she drove, hanging her feet out the window, completely dead, long gashes running up her arms. Family members just walked around the area not even acknowledging her existence.
Sounds to me like you just need a good night's rest. Perhaps there is a physician in your area who could give you a prescription for mild sleeping pills? 10 days of mild sleeping pills should do the trick, but the physician would be a much better judge of that than I would.
If you're able to, I would set aside an entire weekend to relax and get as much sleep as you can stand.
Drink enough water. Stay away from anything that would keep you up -- caffiene, etc.
After that initial weekend of catch-up sleep, I would go to bed at the SAME TIME EVERY NIGHT. Even if you're dragging before then, that's the point!
Have a nightly ritual -- watch the evening news, iron your clothes, feed the cat, shower, brush your teeth, or insert activity here, etc.
Put on your coziest pajamas.
Set the temperature in your room at a comfortable level -- with the comfy blankets on.
Don't do anything in your bedroom other than sleep (no TV, laptop, video game, even books...) Every time you see your bed, you'll just want to crawl right in it and take a nap.
If your neighbors are on a different schedule or make noises that wake you up, invest in a set of ear plugs. If you're uncomfortable wearing ear plugs, try a ceiling or pedestal fan. You'd be amazed how much noise a fan will block, and it is very soothing.
After you get a routine going, you'll have the best night's sleep, and it will feel soooo good!
I don't really know about the other things, but I've been learning about dreams slowly.
And thats pretty much what happens, people ignore it and just plain forget when others die, it's almost like they don't give a blank isn't it, only about themselves, especially suicide victims, or those types of depressed people. Hell, they hardly acknowledge eachother in a positive way when they are alive even.
And if you care, it hurts, and if you say something, they will get onto you for being negative or whiney, they love that particular word especially.