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Coping with incontinence

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Everytime I have sex with my husband our bed is soaked by my pee. It just squirts out. And now I am sick with bronchitis and the coughing is so bad that, I am getting myself wet. I have to get up and change myself at least twice a night. A woman once told me about an operation she had and she said it was the best thing for her. Can you maybe help me with my problem? Thanks!


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replied October 12th, 2009
Urinary and Bladder Disorders Answer A7515


Given the data you provided (urination during sexual intercourse), you might be experiencing urine incontinence. There are several types of urine incontinence, including: urge incontinence, overflow incontinence, bedwetting (enuresis) and stress incontinence, which might be the actual type in your case.

Stress incontinence is due to insufficient strength of the pelvic floor muscles. When abdominal pressure is increased (coughing, sneezing, laughing or exercising), the muscles cannot keep the bladder from releasing the urine. In women in menopause the lowered estrogen levels might additionally lower the muscular pressure around the urethra additionally allowing leakage of urine.


You might want to visit a doctor for a physical examination and urinalysis (for urinary infections). The doctor might perform the stress test- where the person is asked to cough as the doctor watches for loss of urine. Ultrasound and/or cystoscopy (visualization of the inside of the urethra and bladder when inserting tiny tube) might be needed, too.

Your doctor might recommend bladder training where the person tries to keep the urine as much as possible, thus training for longer periods between urination. Timed voiding might be especially useful in your case.

In timed voiding, the patient fills in a chart of voiding and leaking. From the patterns that appear in the chart, the patient can plan to empty his or her bladder before he or she would otherwise leak. You might just empty your bladder before having sexual intercourse.

As for surgery options, doctors usually suggest surgery to alleviate incontinence only after other treatments have been tried.


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