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December 8th, 2011
I am 23 and utterly confused about who I am. The longest boyfriend I have had is 2months as I tend to get out of the relationship before things become serious in anyway. I have never had sex and the last time I kissed someone was 3 years ago. I hardly ever find guys attractive. When a guy starts chatting me up I usually just blow them off and get myself out of the situation.
The few crushes I have had have been on friends I have known for a long time and they have developed but even when I have a crush on them I’m still not really that attractive to them.
The past year I have become really good friends with a girl I work and like boys I don’t find her physically attractive either. I do find myself thinking about her when I go to sleep and wondering what it would be like to kiss her.
Now that may sound like I might be a lesbian but deep down inside I don’t think I am that goes about being straight as well I don’t think I’m that either.
A lot of my friends are gay and are convinced I am gay to and that I just haven’t come out yet or that I just don’t know that I am yet. I go to a lot of gay clubs and get chatted up and just like when I guy tries to chat me up I completely blow them off.
I have some feelings towards guys and some towards girls over the last year is gone more towards the girls though (I feel that’s because of the girl I work with). I only get these feelings when I have known the person for a while. It’s never like damn there hot and I’m instantly attracted to one sex or the other.
The thought of having sex with a guy or a girl really does nothing for me.
I think it’s been so long now that the thought of having a relationship with a guy or girl scares the crap out of me and I would rather be alone. Thing is my own company is boring the life out of me now and at 23 you would think I would of gotten my !**@! together by now and be like many of my mates who are moving in and starting a life with their partners.
Does this make sense to anyone or am I destining to be alone and completely confused forever.
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First Helper claire239
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wondererr
replied December 19th, 2011
I feel like i'm in a similar situation. i don't have an answer, but you're not alone. A relationship of any kind scares me, but i've always considered myself straight, but i think about being with women too.
hope you find what you're looking for.
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nocturnalnyc
replied January 26th, 2012
hey, try dating a few girls or maybe some guys. of course is tough since most people in general are looking for sex and want a hook up based on attraction. in the end you should be with whom you desire, someone who fills u up, make you happy, and smile. it should never be based on attraction. give it a try. there might be some bumps along the way. but every date or relationship is a learning experience, it takes time to find that significant other but dont rush, if you feeel single is best way to be at the moment then remain that way and let things flow
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Did you find this post helpful?
nocturnalnyc
replied January 26th, 2012
hey, try dating a few girls or maybe some guys. of course is tough since most people in general are looking for sex and want a hook up based on attraction. in the end you should be with whom you desire, someone who fills u up, make you happy, and smile. it should never be based on attraction. give it a try. there might be some bumps along the way. but every date or relationship is a learning experience, it takes time to find that significant other but dont rush, if you feeel single is best way to be at the moment then remain that way and let things flow
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