Hi, Im 17 and I think i have some serious issues. Some days im totally fine and happy but then there are these nights where I cant seem to find a reason to live. I feel i used to be "normal" and do what everyone else did but I have always been very self concious and shy. As I have grown in High School I have become more confident but have also become more worried about my weight. At the moment I weigh 125 lbs and am 5'6''. I know this is a healthy weight but i feel trapped. To get down to this weight I have become a compulsive runner. I now run 6 miles 4 days a week and play soccer when I dont run. I feel terrible if i dont run and try to eat less. I have not gotten my period in two months and I no longer eat a "real" lunch at school. My lunch consists of an apple and carrots. I am obsessed with calories and looking up diet foods or nutrition information. I hate it! I want to be able to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch like all of my friends or hang out with them after school instead of running but I feel like I cant. I dont want to gain weight but I cant keep doing this. I feel like everything I eat stays with me and makes me gain weight, yet my friends hardly exercise and eat twice as much as me and look better. I dont remember how I ever lived without exercising and how I ever used to eat as much as I did. I dont know how to tell anyone this without them thinking i am crazy but I think I need help.