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Close to 30 years old,no Girlfriend,still a virgin. So Depressed

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March 7th, 2010
Hi All

This is the first time I’ve ever written on a public site but I felt, what the hell. I’m less than a month from my 30 birthday and I’m still single. I’ve never had a woman I can call my girlfriend and it making me sad Sad . When I was younger I was a big guy which meant that most women stayed away from me. I have a nice personality and a kind heart but this means that most women see me in the friend’s box, not boyfriend material. Last year I lost over 7 stone in weight in just one year which does make me feel better but I don’t seem to meet any women who want to go out with me. For the last few years I’ve been on a quest to improve myself. Reading, listening and researching everything I can get my hands on with regards to dating, self-improvement, fitness and fashion. But it all comes down to one thing, lack of a social life.

I wish I could find a lamp, rub it and request that I meet a woman who has a nice personality, was interesting to listen too and enjoys having fun. A woman who enjoys keep-fit and does not smoke would be a bonus!!!

Like most people, I’ve heard the same responds to my problem, i.e. give it time, you meet someone soon. Well, time waits for no one and I’m only getting older!

Thank you for reading this, it made me feel better just posting this.
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BnG44
replied March 12th, 2010
I am pretty much in your situation. I am going to be 25 this year and have never had any kind of serious relationship with anybody. The most I have done with a girl is kiss and that's it.

You aren't alone. I'm trying to lose weight also, but that is really only part of it. Just try and expand your connections if you only hang out with a close group of friends so you can meet more people.

Try asking some people at work to hang out, or if you take any classes ask someone there. Just do what I am and try to make more friends so you can expand your connections so you can get out there more and meet more people. I am still working on it also but it's just some things I am trying out.

You should also check out the site sosuave.com. They give some great tips and there are many people on their boards on sosuave.net who have the same problems. It helps to read through the site first then go to the forums.

Best of luck to you.
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meandmy2dogs
replied May 6th, 2010
you sound like you have a great personality and a good character.dont be sad. someone out there is waiting to meet you and be with you Smile

I am just trying to be optimistic, as I am also single right now. Ive never had a bf again since me and my last boyfriend broke up in 2006. There are times when I feel lonely, but yeah I guess it is part of nothaivng someone, and everywhere you look you see your friends all happy with their partners/bfs/gfs.

I have been reading books written by Andrew Matthews. Its a good book. You can check it out.
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blazeblue1991
replied June 5th, 2012
ya i know how you feel i am 20 years old going on 21 in september and whats worst my friend he is 17 and got him self a girl friend and we have a lot in common we are video game nerds and computer nerds that fix computers and like anime and girls stay away from us and now my friend that is a gamer nerd has a good looking girl friend lucky i still feel bad because i dont have one yet
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addicted2three
replied June 30th, 2012
Its gonna be hard for you to try to talk to women if you dont have much experience. I wont lie to you and say theres someone for everyone, because there isnt, but I will tell you one thing. If you relax and show confidence, talk about something that you're passionate about, it will be attractive to a girl.

However, I still refuse to approach attractive women for several reasons:
1. I get bitter when I get rejected
2. I dont trust women to be faithful.

I can't ever see myself happy...with or without a woman
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Rocky87
replied December 4th, 2012
Simple reply
Don't worry dude at least take comfort in the fact that you are not the only person facing this situation but there are many more like you out there with this same situation before them.Take my case.I am a guy 29 years of age a bachelor in the true sense of the word ,meaning that I have never had a girlfriend.I tried proposing my love to a friend, a girl only thing is she told me she considers me a good friend and that's all.See I am the type of friend who will be with a friend in his/her time of need and offer help and advice when most needed and maybe this is why she considered me as only her friend.But I have accepted that maybe I will be single for life and die alone in my old age without even a proper funeral i.e leaving my body to rot in my house till only my skeleton is left in my house.But best of luck to you and I pray to God that you will find that someone special very soon.
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fairyfaith
replied December 4th, 2012
Hi!
you sound like such a sweet guy. ive now been single for 6yrs due to havin extremly bad relationships, ive actually now terrified to even date or look at a guy! men tell me im very attractive but my hackles go up n i go on the defence. This has made me an extremly lonely unconfident female!!
But its made me realise that its important to go for wots inside than anything else. I dont go for good lookin guys, there trouble in my eyes! so remember its wots inside that counts, they wil love u for u. u cant beat a great personalitie n as for socialisin, thats not always the way forward when lookin for love!! remember just b ur self and a MASSIVE well done wit loosin the weight! Stay strong x
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TJames28
replied December 4th, 2012
I'm in the same boat bro! I'll be 28 in a month and I've never had a true girlfriend. Sure, I've slept around, but never a g/f. I've been on a lifelong diet and I also have had to lose weight to even want to try to date. So, you're not alone, I feel the same thing!
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hjghjgvjkhjho
replied April 17th, 2013
The reality is that women are cold hearted... they don't care, or 98% of them anyway. At the end of the day a woman can have any guy she wants, and any woman that tells you "there will be somebody out there" maybe in a womans world yes. Woman don't understand what its like to be a guy and how impossible it can be to get a into the relationship zone. I'm not as unfortunate as some guys, I'm grateful that I've had relationships in the past and experienced being with a woman, however I've had to settle for much less for what I feel I'm worth, and gone through hell, and sometimes when you're in a relationship you wish that you never was in a relationship. The pain is much worse when you get hurt. I know for those it can be hard to understand that for those who have never experienced having a woman. So next time a woman says "oh there will be somebody out their for you, you're a good looking guy" ask that woman if she would date you and there is you're answer. Yep
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