Teen Pregnancy Forum - Child custody and marriage when teen pregnant

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Q: Child custody and marriage when teen pregnant

asked by: im a good guy on March 20th, 2008

New User

ok hi my name is thomas i am 17 and im a guy my girlfriend is 15 i will leave her nameless but will call her my love for now. ok we are sexually active she is pregnant i love her more than anything in the world...

she is pregnant

i want to marry her we have been dating for 6 months since march 6th she is two months pregnant i am financialy able to take her and our baby in my custody

there are a few problems though her father hates me cause he doesnt belive i love her is what im thinking but i do love her

her father is abusive i have seen him hit her and havent been able to do any thing about it

last night she told her parents today they took her to get tested she got tested twice by a doctor she is 2 months

today i needed to see her for emotional support because today is also the one year anaversary of my mother dying and her and her ex told me to go up there so i did

i get up there walk up to infront of her porch and he says leave my property right now and i said i need to talk to my love now

and what does he do he walks down and starts shoving me keep it in mind that i am a minor and i said i wont leave untill i can see lmy love so he continues to my count of 32 times he shoved me and i stood and took every one like a man

cops show up give me a ticket for tresspassing so i tried and i begged to see her but they said leave now or we will arrest you and then she said to leave so i did

i love this girl and i want to marry her that is from the heart

so if anyone can help me get her and her syblings and my unborn child out of that house or if you have some advice please i need your help

if it is a girl she will be named nevaeh and if it is a boy it will be named joshua thomas

please help me and my future child and futyre wife Sad

Replies(17)

pregmumof2

replied on March 23rd, 2008

Moderator

well for one I don't understand how the police were that down on you (yes i no you were trespassing as you say) but as a minor and he was shoving you around that is classed as abuse and you could have him for bodily harm against a minor.You need to go somewhere like a citizens advice beauro and see what rights you have...I'm afraid though as a minor i'm not sure if you have many if any.She is still in the care of her parents too.She could phone child line or someone else who is worried about her could phone them and say that her father is hitting her...you could maybe see a lawyer about things but that will get costly.other than that....she will have to leave of her own accord and she seems to be staying put at her parents for now.Does she want marriage????????? Does she want to be with you????????????? Is she keeping your baby?????????? if the answer to my questions is yes then you are in good favour.Hope I have helped a bit.Jade.

benc152

replied on March 26th, 2008

Experienced User

Meet up with her someone else. Not her house/around her dad if he's going to be like that.
You can't marry her while she's that young without her parents consent... but you don't need to be married to prove you love her.
Just get in contact with her away from him and have a chat about where you're both at and what you both want to do in reguards to your future and the babies future.

krystineM

replied on March 27th, 2008

Extremely eHealthy

i think the law, is that if a girl is under 15 and wants to be married to someone a little older the parents have to give concent.
You both [if you meet somewhere else..a friends house the mall anywhere else!] could go to the police station and file charges against her dad, and explain what is going on with the two of you. How long have you 2 been dating?
I was looking at a borchure in my counsellors office...it was for Student Justice, i think for like abuse cases or other cases with the student. They give student welfare or boarding to get out of their house, you could have her file that to get her out of the house, but then talk to a counsellor and say you want her in you house. Have you talked to your dad or anyone that you live with? They probably could help you out alot with this.
How long till she turns 16? is it a while from now, or a little sooner, because at 16, she can walk out and the parents cannot stop her, a cop told me that once.
She's probably scared to leave right now because of her situation [pregnant, dad maybe still hitting her, mom not doing anything, probably getting hit too] So talking to a police officer, and possibly a social worker/counsellor would help alot plus if you get your parent/guardian involved too.

Mabel

replied on March 27th, 2008

Moderator

A 15 year old would end up in foster care. She wouldn't be given welfare to live on her own. Unless she has other family that would take her, she'd go to a foster home.

krystineM

replied on March 27th, 2008

Extremely eHealthy

well thats why i also had said, if his parents got involved, they may want the girlfriend to be in their care and house. So she could go with them, if they want to take care of her..like a foster family would.

rainstorm

replied on March 27th, 2008

Experienced User

I hope they could arrange it so she goes with them and not some other foster family.

Don't her parents have to be found incompetent or something to get their daughter taken away?

krystineM

replied on March 27th, 2008

Extremely eHealthy

well if their abusing her and theres signs of trama, i think she could get out faster.

pregmumof2

replied on March 28th, 2008

Moderator

this post has been here for some while as i can remember i was the 1st to reply and that was some time ago so i'm wondering why hes not answering any of our questions???? maybe things have kicked off.

Mabel

replied on March 28th, 2008

Moderator

It was only 8 days ago. Sometimes people create accounts, make posts and never return. Maybe his life got in the way.

pregmumof2

replied on March 28th, 2008

Moderator

Hmmmm maybe she left her parents and they have gone away together.

Mabel

replied on March 28th, 2008

Moderator

That does not sound like a good idea. They are both quite young. I hope there has been a better solution than that.

pregmumof2

replied on March 28th, 2008

Moderator

yeah especially if shes being smacked around by her father...i was shocked by the police story he said about as that wouldn't have been handled that way in England.i know i'm still in my training and have had to take time off due to pregnancy but we would have taken a statement from him about his girlfriend being hit at least.

Mabel

replied on March 28th, 2008

Moderator

Please remember we are only hearing one single side to the story. We have no idea how these parents really behave.

krystineM

replied on March 28th, 2008

Extremely eHealthy

come on, the way police officers deal with kids, is if your getting 'in the way' or an ADULT says hes trespassing, they are going to take the adults side. No matter what.
they dont care what a punk has to say in the matter.

im a good guy

replied on April 6th, 2008

New User

sorry

my computer broke she turns 16 in september and i turn 18 this month we have been dating 7 months today and i cant get proof of the abuse even though ive seen it and my father is abusive dont live with him im on my own now and he will have no part in hers or my childs life and maybe when i turn 18 i can get legal custody over her but everyone that has access to her just make it worse for us and her parents havent let her out of the house for months other than for school and i cant go on campus or i get arrested but i really miss her

krystineM

replied on April 6th, 2008

Extremely eHealthy

why dont you talk to a social worker, a counsellor or someone who can talk with her parents about this whole situation. they have to know that you are wanting to be there for the child and provide for your girlfriend and baby too.
because clearly they arent going to listen to you. why would you get arrested if you go on campus? are you not a student there anymore or do you go to a different school? can she not meet up with you on a lunch break or something, like across the street from school or something like that?
does she have a cell phone so you can call her, i would talk to a aocial worker and explain everything of whats happened.

jaleo

replied on April 25th, 2008

New User

just so u know... in the state of georgia if a girl of at least sixteen is pregnant she can legally marry the father.

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