I dissagree...we aren't all born cheaters...i love my boyfriend very much..the thought of being with another man, or even wanting another man has not crossed my mind, i still look at guys..sure, and i'll think "wow hes cute" or what not but i dont WANT him...i want and love my boyfriend, i have no desire for any other man...
we've been together almost 2 1/2 years now

I'm not a cheater. Aside from the fact that I have no desire to cheat, I would never hurt my partner that way. It's all about respect and maturity. If I had so little respect for him I would end the relationship then go do what I pleased. I would never feel entitled to keep what I have with him and be with someone else on the side. I don't think there is any excuse for cheating when both partners assume or have agreed that it is an exclusive relationship. Any excuse that a person has can be answered with either fix the relationship or end it, then go do what you please. Also, who ever told people that marriage is easy? Is someone out there lying to people and telling them that there is a guarantee of 24-7 happiness once you are married? Relationships require work. Every day. Period. That means committment, compromise, compassion and communication, from both parties. Otherwise you are the luckiest 0.0000001% of the world or you are just deluding yourself. Hello? Are people not listening to themselves when they promise to love for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse, til death do us part? If they can't stick by those words, maybe they shouldn't be making the vows. Nobody is holding a gun to their heads.

Oh, and NOBODY should be taking any love advice from Norbit.

Hmm.. Besides love? Integrity. Respect. Decency. The list goes on, but as you can see from the previous posts the main reason would be ‘love’ after all.

worry wart I understand where you are coming from but look at it from another perspective. We are born with a choice to cheat now whether we act upon it or not is our own free will.

Everyone has a different view of cheating therefore it really depends on the person.

THANK YOU...marriage is not bliss..NO relationship is bliss..i agree that it takes work..and there are going to be days that you will fight..no relationship is perfect..but when you speak those vows thats a promise for life, you have to work through the difficult times, and if cheating is a problem for you, then clearly you haven't found the right person..because when you find that person..you live to make them happy and to see them smile, you cherish every moment spent together,your in it through the good times and the bad...and if being with someone else even once crosses your mind..then you have no business promising to share your life with that person...i could never ever hurt my bf like that...ever...even if i hated him...you just dont do that to someone...

yes but you provided the quote saying "everyone is born a cheater" thats what I was dissagreeing with..yes you have a choice..for me the "choice" is simple,i'm not cheater, i wasn't born a cheater..i will never be a cheater..i think its completely selfish and disrespectful and can seriously emotionally damage someone to the point that future relationships are difficult for them bc of trust issues...i have always said that i would never date a cheater...if i find out the guy has cheated in a previous relationship thats it..i'm out..i dont even want to give it a chance..if you were unfaithful before then what makes me so special that you wont be unfaithful to me?

I think the phrase "everyone has the choice to cheat" is comparable to just about anything. Everyone has the choice to rape a child, or to skin a dog alive, or to walk into a heavily populated area and start shooting people at random. Just because you have the choice to do something doesn't mean you were "born" to do it.

If someone feels the desire to cheat but does not act on it, I wouldn't call them a cheater. If someone neither felt the desire to cheat nor actually cheated, I wouldn't call them a cheater. Until they actually went outside of their relationship and cheated, I would not assume they were a cheater.

I think I get what you're saying diamondsz, and I think it really depends on how you define cheating.

What would you consider cheating? Are you "cheating" when you have a racey day dream about someone other than your partner? Are you "cheating" if you masturbate? If your partner told you he/she was having occasional day dreams about someone else, would you have a problem with it?

I could dig up dozens of posts where both men and women feel like their partners are unfaithful because of such instances. Are you a cheater for considering/thinking about being with someone else or is it just when you actually initiate a physical relationship outside of another?

I think everyone is born to deceive in some type of way, either extreme or minor (I didn't take the cookie!). Cheating on a partner is just an extreme of that.

My husband and I are very flirtatious people. Constantly joking and 'hitting on' others. He's always telling me who he'd sleep with, and I tell him who I'd sleep with, obviously if we weren't together. I would NEVER cheat on him for ANYONE. Mainly because I don't want to mess up our relationship.

I'd say I was born a cheater, but in a very small amount. I did cheat on one of my boyfriends, but I felt so guilty about it I broke down crying and told him about it the next morning. Thankfully he was understanding and we are great friends to this day.

I don't think "love" has anything to do with it. If you are in a relationship, you don't exactly have to love that person. It's all about if you are LOYAL or not. If you are loyal and are happy, there is no reason to cheat, IMO.

Interesting…
Okay, what is considered ‘cheating’? My personal definition is not doing anything that I wouldn’t do if my fiancé stood right next to me. So for our relationship it would be no sex, kissing, flirting etc. What would you guys consider as cheating?

What keeps people from cheating? Maturity and self-respect. What makes people cheat? Cowardness and weakness.

thats a great way to put it..i agree...i think flirting is ok so long as its harmless and there are no underlying intentions..its human nature to flirt and joke around but it shouldn't be taken seriously..definitely nothing physical for sure..and there are certain conversations that shoudln't be had as well...as you said..nothing you wouldn't say or do right in front of your significant other...

I'm one of those people, who feels like they would actually be physically incapable of cheating. I feel so guilty if I only LIKE a guy and another guy shows interest, that I couldn't possibly even THINK about it if I was in a relationship. If I like a guy and they have shown interest in me, I'll not look at anyone else.
So no, I don't believe that everyone is a "born cheater".