Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 years and i have no erge to have sex, its like i dont like sex anymore and is beginning to become a serious problem, i no he wont leave me but we hardly ever have sex. Its only once every 2 weeks we have sex, please help?
Lack of sex drive (lack of libido or 'female sexual arousal disorder'-FSAD) is quite common in women. Fortunately, for many women lack of libido is only temporary. Certain women will get over it by themselves, and a lot more can be helped by expert medical or psychosexual advice.
As is the case with men, lack of desire in women can be of either physical or psychological origin ( physical causes might be: anemia due to iron loss during periods, alcoholism, drug abuse, major diseases-diabetes, post-baby coolness after childbirth, miscarriage or abortion linked to hormonal changes that occur, prescribed drugs, particularly tranquillizers, hyperprolactinemia where the pituitary gland is overactive, other hormone abnormalities: lower production of luteinising hormone (LH) often causes lack of desire, lack androgenic (male) hormones, etc. psychological causes, very common, such as: depression, stress, overwork, anxiety hang-ups from childhood, past sexual abuse or rape, hidden lesbianism, serious relationship problems with a partner, difficult living conditions, e.g. sharing a home with parents).
No matter what causes the low libido, it is recommended that you try to fix it with your partner first, by discussing your feelings of guilt, candlelit dinner, making the foreplay much slower and longer, massaging with aromatic lotions, experimenting a lot during sex, incorporating new positions/techniques, telling him directly what feels pleasant, etc. The actual love-making does not have to start with a desire for that, the desire will develop later, during the actual thing. If this does not help, you and your partner might want to consult your family doctor, gynecologist or sex-therapist, who might do the necessary tests to discover the cause of low libido and prescribe an adequate treatment, if needed.
In general, there is a need to look carefully at the causes of the problem â preferably with the loving cooperation of your partner. There arenât usually any quick fixes.
However, the results are promising: a high proportion of women do eventually achieve a return to normal libido.
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