i think you need to explore your own body to see what makes you tick.
for example i can obtain an orgasm while masturbating, but my old girlfriend could not, but she can by running warm water on her clitoris.
have you ever used one of those removable shower heads. if not, you have to try it.
have you used a dildo, or vibrator?
are you farmilar with your body sexually and what turns you on. if so, your b/f should always give you foreplay before sex, and make sure he touch, lick, suck, and caress what turns you on.