Medical Questions > Womens Health > Vaginal and Uterus Health Forum

Can't feel sex anymore !

Must Read
To better understand abnormal vaginal bleeding, we first review normal vaginal bleeding. Do you know when uterine blood is normal, or not?...
What are the signs and symptoms of abnormal vaginal bleeding? When should you seek help?...
Prepare yourself and know what to expect when you visit your doctor for vaginal bleeding. We review the medical tests and diagnostic procedures frequently used....
I love sex. I have always loved sex. It's something i need in my life to have a healthy relationship, but now I feel like I am losing my ability to feel sex. It started slowly. i could only feel sex in the doggy style position. or in a sideways position i have only been able to master once, or in the missionary position if i grabbed my legs and arched my pelvis up. I thought it was because I gained a LOT of weight, i thought it had something to do with the fat getting in the way. I have been with the same guy for almost four years now and we have had lots and lots of great sex, but always in the doggy style position because that's the only way i could feel it. I have recently lost about 25 LBS, I don't know if this could have anything to do with it. It started out with a few bad sessions here and there where i couldn't feel anything no matter which way I angled myself, it seems to work better if i point my vagina downwards against the top of his penis but the feeling comes for a second and than nothing. it actually hurts when he does it too hard and i used to like it that way. Sex for me now just feels very uncomfortable and boring.
I don't know what is causing this problem but i am willing to do or try ANYTHING to bring the feeling back :'(
Did you find this post helpful?
|

replied January 5th, 2010
Re: help me! i can't feel sex anymore!
mysticfire01 wrote:
I love sex. I have always loved sex. It's something i need in my life to have a healthy relationship, but now I feel like I am losing my ability to feel sex. It started slowly. i could only feel sex in the doggy style position. or in a sideways position i have only been able to master once, or in the missionary position if i grabbed my legs and arched my pelvis up. I thought it was because I gained a LOT of weight, i thought it had something to do with the fat getting in the way. I have been with the same guy for almost four years now and we have had lots and lots of great sex, but always in the doggy style position because that's the only way i could feel it. I have recently lost about 25 LBS, I don't know if this could have anything to do with it. It started out with a few bad sessions here and there where i couldn't feel anything no matter which way I angled myself, it seems to work better if i point my vagina downwards against the top of his penis but the feeling comes for a second and than nothing. it actually hurts when he does it too hard and i used to like it that way. Sex for me now just feels very uncomfortable and boring.
I don't know what is causing this problem but i am willing to do or try ANYTHING to bring the feeling back :'(


Hello Mysticfire!

You don't say how old you are, or if you've ever had any children, or a prolapsed uterus, and those answer's may, or may not matter. My prolapsed uterus (from having childen - thus the question about your age) did cause pain with sex. Sometimes, if you have a prolapsed uterus you can lose sexual sensation during intercourse, or intercourse can become painful.

I beleive what you are saying is that it doesn't feel good when you have sex anymore. You used to be able to get a "pleasurable," or "turned-on" feeling (in order to orgasm) when you had sex, and now you don't. I've had the same problem in the past and it's not unusual. It could be a variety of different things, from not getting enough stimulation before your partner penetrates, to just being bored because there is no variety in your sex life.

I would suggest that you ask your boyfriend to spend more time getting you aroused before sex. Try having him orally stimulate you, or have him use his fingers to bring you to orgasm, or both!

Your boyfriend can also use his fingers to stimulate the spongy ridge-filled wall that is located at the top of the inside of your vagina, and if he puts his finger(s) in far enough and shapes them like a "hook" and makes a "come hiter" gesture with his fingers (kind of like a stroking motion) he might be able to reach your "G" spot.

This is the area that you said feels good when your boyfriend hits it with his penis during sex "doggie style." At least that was the case with me, and my problem.

Now that i have a boyfriend that cares about my pleasure and is willing to take his time learning my body and it's responses, I have the best orgasms and sex of my life. We learned about stimulating the "G" spot by reading about it and he tried it with me. The first 10 times or so it was painful and sore, and was scared. But as I learned to relax and trust him, and I learned to let go of the tension and embarrassment I was feeling, I had the most amazing pleasure and now I have "GUSHING" orgasms that I didn't beleive other woman had. But I do!

If he does find your "G" spot and stimulates it, there may be some initial pain because of the new sensation, (there was for me) but eventually it will be pleasurable. Just make sure you tell him to start out slowly and gently because that is a very sensitive spot. It is just behind your clitoris (but on the inside of your vagina) so there are a lot of nerve endings there.

In some cases penis size or shape can have an effect on where you are being stimulated inside your vagina. Sometimes gaining or losing weight can affect how far a penis can go up inside your vagina, which might have an effect on how it feels. I know I used to get more pleasure from "doggie style" sex too (I thought it was because of my weight too.) But now I am with a man that will do anything to please me sexually and I have really relaxed, making a big difference in the pleasure I receive. I can now only have sex missionary style (laying on my back) because I have 4 lumbar disks (lowest disks in your back) that are herniated.
So I have had to experiment with new ways to "feel good" or orgasm, during sex.


Make sure that you are both willing to talk about what feels good. Don't be afraid to tell him if it does, or doesn't feel good when he is trying to arouse you. Remember, unless you tell him where, when and how...How is he going to know?

GOod luck, hope this helps?
|
Did you find this post helpful?