I'M confused about having a possible eating disorder...
I gained like 14 lbs around 2 years ago, then I started making myself sick after lunch at work, then I started using laxatives and being obsessed by weight and counting calories. I lost the weight I gained and for the last year have maintained my normal weight of 124lbs, age 20 and at 5 ft 5 that's perfectly healthy.
I no longer purge, or take laxatives, yet after every time I eat I just want to go and puke.
Things got better this summer, but now things have taken a turn for the worse, so I'm a bit confused. It's like I have all the thoughts, but I'm resisting to the point where I'm not actually binging and purging. So in theory I have all the mental symptoms, but none of the physical and I just don't understand what to do. What would be the best course of action for me?
If I was to speak with my university counciler about these issues would it jepordise my position on my degree course?
Hi sweetgirl89 and welcome to eheatlh: I think you understand the power of Bulimia and in the back of your mind fear what could happen...You are right...It is a powerful disease that can take over your mind and control your body...My best advice is to resist...Do not falter...Make it a way of life...Push this past experience out of your mind and make it part of your "yesterday"....I think you can handle this yourself...My best advice would be never to let yourself eat to the point where you are stuffed...Eat to be comfortable...It is in times like that you can play with your mind and try to convince yourself that this is the thing to do...You can win this battle...You are on the right track...Honey, I wish you well...We are always here...Take care...
I understand how you feel. When I began as a bulimic and tried to stop, my body was already "programmed" to throw up everything solid that I consumed and I would throw up automatically. You have to ease your way back - sort of like the stomach flu. Also, you might have to check with the doctor to see if you haven't triggered any acid reflux problem. I have a minor one and I have to take pills for it.
Even though you're not physically doing anything now, I suggest you do speak with someone: a councillor or someone outside of the university, like your family doctor. The fact that you're considering to speak with someone is a good sign. It shouldn't jeopardise anything. The only way it'll jeopardise your position is if you let it take over until it's too late.
I agree with CarolineEF: you're on the right track, especially since you notice the symptoms. I wish you good luck! Please let us know how it went and if you need any feedback for anything else. I got faith in you, girl!