broken and thrown away :( help me please

I'm so sorry, it sounds so painful. But you sound like the sweetest of guys and it is unfair for you to go through what you have gone through. You deserve better and she is not worth those tears, because she told you one thing and done another. She got your hopes up and thats not a good sign of a good person. You need to move on, or else your just destroying yourself. Take your mind off her, join a club or something where you can interact with other people. You honestly deserve more... get yourself out there and find someone who will appreciate you for who and what are and will be honest with you.

My dear friend .. I read your message several times. But each time you discovered that you want to win in this relationship. But do not get angry if at all. Will give you the advice you have to work for life. . You love her with all your heart. But I want to tell you. Try to keep away from her. And remember that life is have most beautiful and most morally. Look for the girl who finds it fit to be mother of your children in the future. . not only body in bed. And you have to be strong. Believes that these things not in your hand. And it's in God(ALLAH) hands and God wants you well always. You take care of your business more. And smiling in the face of others. Mark and loves all people and be generous and kind-hearted. Leave this girl. Such birds may return to you. Or is no longer. So be confident in God that he knows the unseen and want you the right thing. And also cover for your heart a chance to recognize a girl with good morals. Not accompanied but marry her. Stay away from the lives of adolescents. And show the life of truth and the life. And build yourself. And do not let the past spoil anything morals. But Guo Make the move forward. I read your message by accident and made me sad too. Weakened in front of you her love. But you must be strong and faithful. I know that I may be not good in English. I am from Egypt. But we are all human beings. We may be different in religion. But this is what the religion commands us to believe Basahih and look for the truth. And the year preceding good care. If we let one do not look for it. This may be good for us.

Let me be brutal, you have asked for help not pity, and its what your prepared to do to get over this and move on. Its all a big lesson not a problem that is insumountable.
Check what it is in your upbring that has made you so needy. You have lost the love of yourself first and lost respect for yourself. that is why she or any other person will not stay around.
You are a beautiful person, you know this but not honouring it. Let no man or woman takke away th elight of your soul. The attachment to another is for faith ourpose and expansion not the opposite.
This is not about her its all about what you think of yourself and th elack of love for yourself.
Phillip
take it easy onyourself and start strengthing th emind.
A great course that will allow you to live more powerfully and inspire others in the forum, Landmark education. I promise you will never look back.

I have a very similar situation. We lived together for over a year. There was two years of friendship leading up to a serious relationship which we were ecstatically excited about starting. We had a house in the hills, did most things together and I felt what I thought was true love. She proposed to me twice, which meant the world to me, but I told her I want to take my time with that. Reason being I'm 31 and she's 20. I know she needs to mature. Unfortunately that means a whole lot of confusion. She broke up with me, saying we moved in too fast and wants to learn how to be independant and learn herself more. That day changed my life, we had about six weeks where I was working out what was really happening here. This is a very complex story as they all are and can't be fully explained here.

So we went back to dating informally. Had a ball. She's do 180 flips and fall in love with me again....only to flip the other way. Six months on she moved 2000k's away to sort herself out and live with her alcoholic mother with a husband she doesn't like. Again by text she finally told me she's been seeing someone. They met 8 months ago and she hated him at first then one day told me she is friends now because it was her girlfriends bestie and she had to be friends. They started spending a lot of time together and she always lied about it.

I asked her a few straight questions to get my facts straight and start the process of piecing it all together. She told me facts and I ended it with a text because she would not call me. She kept texting me and got her girlfriend to text me, said she was freaking out. At the end of the day she could never bring herself to call me about anything important.

Although everything she did encouraged me to hang on. She'd hold my hand everywhere we went in public, she'd cuddle me in the shop while I was trying to work. She planned dates. Every other day she was working on her new relationship even more. She even asked me to pack down the bed she'd been having sex on the day before she left. We fell asleep spooning in the couch for hours. I gave her a gold hearted necklace and she told me she loved me. She said not to take her to the airport as she didn't want tears. Really it was because the other guy took her.

This is a small snippet of how hard she could lie. Not a good person at all.

I gave away my MTB racing six months ago because I thought and still think that's where I went wrong. I was training twenty hours a week around full time work.

Now I smoke 30 cigs a day. I'm stoned before work and think degrading thoughts about her sexually. I gave myself permission to let myself go. It's the only way I can sleep at night.

Despite how she played me, she clearly doesn't love me. That's the end. I can think think about it all I like, doesn't matter. None of it mattered. She's dead to me and she took me with her.

It actually feels like she's climbing on me to reach the water surface so she can breath and I drown.

She's a wench and karma will take care of the rest I hope.

The crooked front tooth should have been the giveaway for me.

.....and I'm lost because I'm still in love with her, how sick is that. I never said one bad word to her or did anything mean, I never lied. I loved her with everything I had and it was wasted in the wrong girl. Now there's nothing left to give.

But i dodged a bullet!