Medical Questions > Relationships > Broken Hearted Forum

Breaking up when you still care for one another

A couple of days ago my partner left me, im finding it so hard to cope as i know we love each other so much but he cant cope with the fact i have a connection with my childrens father for obvious reason, we get on cos we have to and hes happy in his relationship too.
The other night whilst walking our dog we saw my ex with our kids and obviously i spoke and said bye, see you tomorrow to the children.
Well my partners face looked mortified said he couldnt cope with him being around and left me Sad
Im devastated, he said it was the final straw! But its ridiculous
I txt him the next day but in no uncertain terms he tol me not to get in touch,he cares about me but he cant cope with me having that connection with my ex husband
I have to say this isnt the first time but it feels pretty definate this time, i just dont know what to do Sad please can anyone help
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replied May 30th, 2012
I know how your partner feels, coz I'v been feeling jealous myself of the mother of my boyfriend's son, even if there is no obvious reason to be so. Can suggest two things:
1. to have a child with your partner, then he will not feel that you have a more solid connection with another man than with himself.
2. to explain again and again why you broke up with your ex husband and why you would never ever get back to him. It may be that you should re-examine 'that connection' with your ex, which may include some sort of flirtation or intimacy that drives him crazy. You should make it clear to yourself and him which connection is more important to you, the one with your ex or with your current partner. If you reply the second, then you should show more understanding and sympathy, rather than thinking it as something 'ridiculous'. Good luck Smile
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replied May 30th, 2012
Your partner knows that since you and your ex have a decent relationship whether its for the kids or not, there will always be something between you. Its difficult for someone that is on the outside of a situation like that. Thats why sometimes its actually easier if ex's hate each other.
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replied May 31st, 2012
Thanks for the replies, wouldnt you think after being together 7 years though this kind of jealosy would go away, maybe not
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replied June 1st, 2012
I guess it would depend on how well you and your ex get along. Since you share children there will always be something between you. Maybe your BF thinks that what he sees looks more like a wishful reunion than just 2 people being civil for the children's sake..
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