My girlfriend and I have not had sex, no oral sex either, only fingering and the like.
My girlfriend is I guess what you might call a "half-virgin." Her last boyfriend and her had sex, but because her mom caught them (on their first and last time: her mom put a stop to the relationship after that), both her and her boyfriend were virgins, therefore inexperianced so it wasn't very intense sex, and they had only been having sex for about 5 mintues before her mom walked in; she wasn't penetrated very deep or hard, and no orgasm/ejaculation took place. She bled ONE time AFTER her last boyfriend fingered her and did not bleed during or after the sexual encounter with that same boyfriend.
I am the only person besides this other guy who has fingered her (or anything else).
The first couple of times I fingered her, nothing happened (as far as irregularities) she was the first girl I had ever fingered and we only did it 3 times before she started her period. As this was new to us we of course started right where we left off the day after her period ended. Since then, it has been a regular occurance that her vagina bleeds during fingering.
At first we assumed that we had simply misjudged when her period had left, but it didn't stop. And it comes at random intervals, too. Sometimes I do it gently and it bleeds, sometimes I do it hard and she doesn't. Samtimes it doesn't when I have long fingernails, sometimes it does when I have short fingernails. But pretty much..... 85 to 90% of the time, it bleeds.
its been a month since then (because she just had another period) and while we had a break I took time to look into some remedies. So, last night, when I fingered her for the first time since her period, I made sure to clip my fingernails, that enough foreplay/teasing occured to make her wet (and she was VERY wet by the time I started fingering), that I went gently at the start and worked my way up.
I thought I had taken every precaution, but she bled.
so now I am baffled, so I wanna hear what you guys think is wrong. If i had to make an educated guess, I would say that at some point during her previous relationship, her hymen (or cherry, IDK if I spelled the first word right), was only partially broken, and that I have just encountered the remnants of it, but if thats the case, why didn't that happen to her during her previous relationship as well? Because that one bleeding that I mentioned in the beginning is the only time she said that she bled like that.
Just a little more oddities FYI, she doesn't orgasm, or at least I haven't made her. Instead, she tells me "stop, its too much, I can't take it." I ask her what she means on occasion, and she tells me that it feels so good that its kind of sickening (she once remarked that when that happened she found it difficult to breathe). And after it one time she asked "I wonder if its possible to pass out from that?"
the second is that occasionally she says hurt a little bit when we first start out, but I think that is because she isn't wet enough. Which I believe may have caused some of the bleeding. She said it hurt her when I pulled out of the vagina partially.
Probably HOW I finger her may also be of use: I generally start off with two fingers (or one, if it hurts her with two) with the palm of the hand facing foreward. I then go in until I hit the skin of the vagina before it starts sloping backwards (deeper into the body and the uterus), I then pull my fingers over the G spot, then I go in again.
thank you for any and all help. I'm a little worried, because I care for this girl and would hate for her to be harmed in any way.
She's going in for a physical tomorrow and I've asked her to ask the doctors about it, but she is scared of her mom finding out that she has had sex (while her mom walked in on her past boyfriend, through convincing from my girlfriend and I guess her unwilling to believe that her daughter has had sex, her mom believes that they were just making out naked and ABOUT to have sex when she walked in, but that no actual penetration took place) so she refuses to ask the doctors about anything relating to her vagina.
thank you for any help. If anything comes from the physical (I don't think anything will) I'll update you guys
A woman's sexuality is the one area a doctor will not discuss with parents. Patient - doctor confidentiality comes into play here. Age is not a factor when it comes to a young woman and her sexuality. There is absolute confidentiality. Her doctor can not discuss this with her parents. The parents should and will be asked to leave the room so the doctor can freely discuss female issues without parental influence. Tell your girl to go to the doctor. She needs information and guidance and the doctor is going to provide accurate information.
what a story..wow can you imagine being caught in the act by your mom?
if she only had sex just that time when she was caught by her mom then she probably does have a partially broken hymen. It took me at least two times of deep penetration in different days to get mine broken.
First note: She is not a "semi-virgin." She's not a virgin. Having sex is defined as penis in vagina, not as orgasm/ejaculation with penis in vagina. So, just wanted to clear that up.
You should really urge her to speak with her doctor. It is probably nothing serious, but the doctor would be able to clear some things up. If you do it while she isn't wet enough, you will tear her skin...and then you may continue to tear skin each time you finger her if you don't give it time to heal. Perhaps you are getting too deep and causing bleeding that way.
Also, it is not uncommon to NOT get an orgasm from fingering (but, it may feel good). Sometimes, the stimulation is so constant with a lot of pressure, that the clitoris can get (what I call) overstimulated. It feels good, but after awhile...it just, hurts. So, don't worry if she doesn't orgasm from fingering.
Its not hurting her, which I'm glad about, but it makes her feel embarrased and I've had to clean my sheets from it a couple of times. I don't mind the last part, but I hate to see her embarrased.
And by half-virgin, I meant that maybe her hymen wasn't popped all the way.
she doesn't feel pain at all. But I do go in pretty far (at least, I think so): when I do it, I penetrate as far in as my fingers go, about 3.5 to 4 inches. And I stimulate (when I'm not actually doing an in/out motion that I described earlier) pretty hard. So that may be it.
I've tried 2 things, making sure she's really wet before I start, and beginning slowly and softly then building up momentum/intensity.
I only got to try this twice though, the first time it worked beautifully and she didn't bleed. The second time (2 days ago), no luck. But the day after she came over and said that she was on her period (which I find odd considering she just came off of one 12 days ago... which seems to be a very short cycle if you ask me, but I'm not a girl lol). So I could attribute the second one to a period. But I'll try again after this one's over and see if what I'm trying actually worked or if its still a problem